Thursday, May 5, 2011

So much to do... so little motivation...

I woke up this morning feeling really motivated to clean my house...
but the feeling passed quickly. Thank goodness!

I'm planning to get another water test done on my aquarium today and see if things are better... my fish are acting better and no more of them have died. :)

12th ward sisters, "Don't LOOK!" (sorry) Everyone else: Look at what's in the top of my closet right now!! I can hardly stand it. My husband is in charge of the Mother's Day gifts for the women in our ward this year and this chocolate is just waiting to be eaten... 140 pieces...
oops, it might be 139.
I love my husband SO much... he loves me back for some strange reason I have yet to understand... maybe there is no explanation, it's just a miracle.
Zeke's using my purple netting/toille for a make-shift fascinator.
It's goes so well with his "Code Monkey" shirt.
I love my children. They drive me crazy sometimes, but I love them so much... this is Zoe and Kaia doing their best version of "Sister Suffragette" from Mary Poppins; you should hear them sing it! They are standing at attention. Zoe's getting pretty good at her British accent: "What IS it, Katie Nana?!"
"We're clearly soldiers in petticoats!

And dauntless crusaders for woman's votes!

Though we adore men individually,

We agree that as a group they're rather stupid!

Cast off the shackles of yesterday!

Shoulder to shoulder into the fray!

Our daughters' daughters will adore us

And they'll sing in grateful chorus:

'Well done, Sister Suffragette!'"

I love my family... I feel like such a weirdo... I don't fit in anywhere... I'm so glad they put up with me. I feel like I don't know how to make friends or be a friend. In general, people just don't like me. (wah, wah, I guess I'll go eat worms...) Please don't comment and say "NO, Lacy, that's not true!!" Really, I'm not looking for sympathy, it's not what I want. I'm looking for reasons why and I'm just telling you what I've observed. People have given me reasons and well, they're just not good enough. It's true. Tonight is Book Club and I've been having that stressful/neurotic/anxious feeling again that I shouldn't go...

I talked to my Mother-in-Law, Patty, this morning... she is a kindred spirit. We talked about our fish and her Entomology finals and our mutual lack of desire to clean our houses... I love this woman. I need her in my life.

13 comments:

  1. You said don't comment, but you certainly know how to be a friend, and have MANY of them. Glad to know someone else besides me is a goofball all the time :) I have you guys have a wonderful graduation party for Zeke--you BOTH earned it! Considering that I live in PHX, don't think I'll be making it to Logan, but I hope it's fabulous!

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  2. Just so you know, you aren't he only one that feels a little odd ocassionally. I always leave group get togethers, i.e bookclub, feeling like I said too much or the wrong thing. But since no one has complained yet, I guess I will let it go. As someone once said to me, don't borrow trouble. Until someone says something to you, assume you are all good. :) You certainly are with me.

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  3. I feel guilty for planning to come to your party. Don't clean the house for me! I like you for who you are and how you make me (and others) feel when I'm around you. If you can make me feel good even when your house is in normal life mode, then maybe there could be hope for me too.

    Go to book club!

    Save me some chocolate.

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  4. #1 - You had me at the title. I feel the same same way.
    #2 - I had a playdate with some women I totally should have been excited to hang out with, but I was dreading it. And it went badly. Why? Because I am a super boring, exhausted mom of four. Who doesn't run, or do anything else cool.
    #3 - Chocolate is soooo much better than a flower or plant for Mother's day.
    #4 - I don't like the me that I am, but I don't know how to become the me I want to be.
    $5 - I may be surviving this day solely on the momentum of morning scripture study and prayer.
    #6 - I like you.

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  5. I love chocolate! Bummer to have moved out of the ward. I love your honesty. You're funny! Good luck with the party. I can't wait to see your dress transformation. That girl is so amazingly creative on the video about wardrobes.

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  6. 1) I adore "Sister Suffragette." Cracks me up every time.

    2) We should start wearing fascinators to book club. Because, you know, we don't already draw enough attention to ourselves. :-)

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  7. 1. I agree every word with what Amanda said

    And 2...if you don't show up tonight, I'll personally come get you! :)

    However, 3. I will veto the fascinator idea from Lacey...

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  8. oh my dear, i'm sorry you feel that way. i'm sure it's not true. but you do seem to have an amazing family. is your hubby a computer programmer? my husband is and he so needs that monkey shirt!

    spinning-threads.blogspot.com

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  9. Lacy,
    I think that is so weird that you say that people don't like you and that you don't have friends because you seem to have a lot. People are always posting really sweet stuff on your blog. If it makes you feel any better I feel the same way. I don't feel like I have any close friends anymore. Their all just people I know that I would consider a friend, but no one ever calls me to do anything or share secrets with me. I am always wondering what is wrong with me too.

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  10. Thanks for your comments everyone :)

    Claire, my husband is a computer programmer (i.e. code monkey) :)

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  11. Hey, I just wanted to mention that I too am sad we're not moving to LOGan, but did I tell you my husband is from Preston? We head there every other summer, or so. :)

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  12. I SOOOO feel the same way, so often! Like everyone else is younger, cooler, more stylish (that's an easy one!), and a better wife/mother/person, AND have way more fun lives. Scoot over and pass the worms!

    Also, I LOVE "Sister Suffragettes", and can totally imagine mini-Lacys performing it! Kudos to you for exposing them to the finer things (and only eating one chocolate!).

    You are awesome. That's all.

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