So much to do... so little motivation...

I woke up this morning feeling really motivated to clean my house...
but the feeling passed quickly. Thank goodness!

I'm planning to get another water test done on my aquarium today and see if things are better... my fish are acting better and no more of them have died. :)

12th ward sisters, "Don't LOOK!" (sorry) Everyone else: Look at what's in the top of my closet right now!! I can hardly stand it. My husband is in charge of the Mother's Day gifts for the women in our ward this year and this chocolate is just waiting to be eaten... 140 pieces...
oops, it might be 139.

I love my husband SO much... he loves me back for some strange reason I have yet to understand... maybe there is no explanation, it's just a miracle.
Zeke's using my purple netting/toille for a make-shift fascinator.
It's goes so well with his "Code Monkey" shirt.

I love my children. They drive me crazy sometimes, but I love them so much... this is Zoe and Kaia doing their best version of "Sister Suffragette" from Mary Poppins; you should hear them sing it! They are standing at attention. Zoe's getting pretty good at her British accent: "What IS it, Katie Nana?!"

"We're clearly soldiers in petticoats!

And dauntless crusaders for woman's votes!

Though we adore men individually,

We agree that as a group they're rather stupid!

Cast off the shackles of yesterday!

Shoulder to shoulder into the fray!

Our daughters' daughters will adore us

And they'll sing in grateful chorus:

'Well done, Sister Suffragette!'"

I love my family... I feel like such a weirdo... I don't fit in anywhere... I'm so glad they put up with me. I feel like I don't know how to make friends or be a friend. In general, people just don't like me. (wah, wah, I guess I'll go eat worms...) Please don't comment and say "NO, Lacy, that's not true!!" Really, I'm not looking for sympathy, it's not what I want. I'm looking for reasons why and I'm just telling you what I've observed. People have given me reasons and well, they're just not good enough. It's true. Tonight is Book Club and I've been having that stressful/neurotic/anxious feeling again that I shouldn't go...

I talked to my Mother-in-Law, Patty, this morning... she is a kindred spirit. We talked about our fish and her Entomology finals and our mutual lack of desire to clean our houses... I love this woman. I need her in my life.

decisions, decisions

Last Saturday, Zeke and I started watching a movie in bed around 10:30pm. FYI, I am NOT a late night person... I just cannot stay awake. So sometime around? I don't know? midnight... I was SCARED awake by this horrible snorting/choking pig noise. Then, I suddenly realized I was choking a little and gasping for air and.... then, I realized it was ME! I had fallen asleep sitting up and snored/snorted so loud I woke myself up. How attractive.

We've been married for 15 years now, and I am still so embarrassed. I think Zeke was embarrassed for me too, because he didn't really laugh too much (on the outside anyway). I was really confused and groggy and said, "*snort* Wha! What's going on?! *gasp*" and he just said, "Uh, honey, I think you were snoring..." Nice. Anyhoo...

Saturday is Zeke's graduation... YAY!
Saturday is also Zeke's big party... it will be fun, right?
So far 168 people have said they are coming. 168 people! In my backyard.
Or if the weather doesn't hold, we'll be at the church, but still.
I've got a LOT of work to do.

So this is what I should be doing:

• mowing the lawn
• cleaning out the garden
• cleaning my house
• grocery shopping
• fixing the hole and scratches in the paint on our wall from trying to put our couch in the basement
  
• getting lights, music, and decorations for the party
• preparing my Primary lesson for Sunday... yeah.
• taking down the trampoline -- 168 people? that's just a law suit waiting to happen.
  
• etc
• etc
• etc (i.e. WORK)
  

This is what I've been doing:

• blogging
• making the "perfect station" on Pandora. Today? The Hives, Jet, Jimmy Eat World, The Script, Jack Johnson...
• playing "Just Dance" with Beck... our favorite song? "Lump" from Presidents of the U.S.A.
• stressing about my aquarium... I lost two fish over the weekend and I took a water sample in to PetSmart and the ammonia levels are really high. Not sure why. I love my fishies.
• sewing funky pillows for my bed, oh the possibilities...
• reading "The Help", so far I like it. It's a great distraction from the party. At this point anything is. I'm excited, but I would rather just have it be here than stress about it.
• stressing about my aquarium... I've changed the water twice since Saturday. :(
• redesigning an old dress of mine after seeing this. I hope it turns out... Here's the before:

I sound like a 10 year old... and you know, this week, I kinda feel like one.

*GOOD NEWS!!* Remember Kaia's weird little growth/mole thing on her tummy? I took her in yesterday and it's nothing serious at all. Some weird phenomenon where the lymph nodes and blood vessels group together on the surface of the skin. Official name? lymphangeoma circum scriptum (spell check did NOT like that one!) Nick name? Frog Spawn! (I am NOT kidding!) When Kaia heard that she yells, "Wicked!!! I'm going to tell Hannah that I have frog spawn on my tummy!" :) Oh, I am so happy it makes me cry. We are blessed.

Oh, and one more VERY important thing... it's Book Club on Thursday! How does it always seem to come just in time?