Best News Ticker Ever

One of my favorite quotes ever is from Thomas S. Monson:

 "The Lord is in the details of our life." 

I love this quote simply because I know it is true.  He is aware of us -- each of us. He know us personally and helps us individually. I'm constantly amazed and humbled by the way He answers my prayers and the fact that He does.

Without getting too personal, I also wanted to share a simple concept I'm learning more and more lately:

Return good for evil.

When people are inconsiderate or even outright cruel, I find great peace in showing them kindness instead of revenge or anger. I wish I could tell you the AWESOME experience I had last week. Basically, the Spirit told me to do something nice for someone I was very upset with. I didn't like the way she was treating me and the things she had been saying. When confronted by her, the Spirit literally spoke to me to do something nice. I did and the results were nothing short of MIRACULOUS! She smiled, I smiled, AND... those feelings of hurt completely and instantly went away.

I am determined not to let all the mean and grumpy people bring me down!

I'm learning more and more that forgiveness is an action on MY part. Not just saying sorry (and definitely not waiting for the other person to apoligize -- that may never happen), but actually DOING something to make amends. Ahhhh. My heart feels good. :)

I was in the temple yesterday and I had to wait awhile before they could take me in to do the ordinance. It was no coincidence to me when a very special person just happened to be there yesterday and we got to visit while we waited together. I just met her recently and she is becoming a great friend. What an amazing lady!! I'll have to write a blog post about her. 

Anyway, about half way through the ordinances, I suddenly became very antsy and felt the need to check the clock. I carpool with another good friend for our little Kindergartners and I knew I had at least another 20 minutes before I had to leave. However, this feeling wouldn't go away and I kept feeling like I need to leave sooner. After about 5 more minutes, I couldn't ignore the feeling any longer, so I told the temple workers I had to leave early. I got to my locker and the Spirt prompted me immediately, "Check your phone!" 

Now, when I tell you the Spirit "spoke to me" or "prompted me" -- it's like a sound recording in my head of my voice, but it's playing in the back of my mind. You know when you watch the news on TV and there's a news ticker running along the bottom of the screen with the latest updates and developing stories and such? I've finally learned that's what the promptings of the Holy Ghost are like to me. I have this special "news ticker" flash across the back of my mind whenever the Spirit is trying to tell me something. I just have to focus on the voice I hear and I can literally "see" that ticker through my mind. 

So back to the story -- I check my phone (in the locker room/dressing room of the temple -- weird I know, but the Spirit told me to). There was a text from my carpool friend sent much earlier saying she wouldn't be able to pick up Beck today and hoped I could. WOW!! Of course I could because the Spirit told me to leave the temple early. It was amazing! Such a simple thing, but I'm so grateful. I was able to pick up Beck right on time and another little girl that I pick up also. It worked out perfectly. 

Now, I know nothing terrible would have happened if I didn't listen to this prompting. I probably would have been about 10-15 minutes late picking up Beck. The teachers probably would have taken him to the office to wait for me and then try to call me, but I'm just so grateful he didn't have to worry or be afraid. I'm SO thankful I didn't have to feel stressed about being late and getting there in a hurry. It was just so comforting to me to KNOW Heavenly Father is aware of me and my family and our life.

How could we ever go wrong if we ALWAYS listened to the promptings of the Holy Ghost?

How can we ALWAYS make sure we are listening?

I want to make sure my life isn't too busy to hear these promptings. I need to slow down and be aware of what's going on and what the Spirit is trying to tell me. I need to make time in my life to act on those promptings. The Lord IS in the details of our life. We need to listen to what He wants us to do.

Another good friend in our new ward made me this beautiful necklace last week! I KNOW she was listening to the Spirit. She had no idea the week I'd had or all of things on my mind that day. I was really feeling down. She somehow knew I needed a friend and stopped by to cheer me up and see how I was doing. There wasn't anything terribly wrong, but I just needed the reassurance there are people out there who care about me. Thank you!

The little stones surrounding the eternity symbol are all of our birthstones (my children, Zeke, and me). I LOVE it! By the way, can you see the little cat scratch just above the edge of my shirt on the right? That's how you know it's ME. I love those crazy fur-balls. 

I know there are people out there who need our help and our friendship. We need to pray for guidance to know who they are and what they need. We can be instruments in God's hands in answering the prayers of another.

Another favorite quote,  

"A coincidence is a small miracle in which God chooses to remain anonymous."

The world is still full of so much good. We need to look for it and ADD to it. 

The good, the bad and the "buggy"

How can someone be SO happy and SO sad all at the same time? Living in my head is exhausting, I tell you! One moment, I'm high as a kite and I love my life, the next, I'm rolling my eyes and muttering under my breath, "Heaven help me be a better person, PLEASE!"

Not sure what I'm blogging about today, but my brain feels overloaded. (Seems to be a common theme, eh?) My blog is turning into my brain dump. Who knows? All of these crumbs might get cooked up into a great book someday... 

So many people in our world today need serious help or even just a friendly face. There are people right in our neighborhood and I'm sure they are right in your neighborhood too! I feel so blessed to be able to serve others and be aware of their needs. I love these people and I hope I can always be in tune with the Spirit and keep my mind and my day open enough to make time for helping others. Dropping everything to run to the aid of another person and feeling the Spirit carry you as you go... there's no other feeling like that.

Such a wonderful day yesterday in so many ways. Beck and I played Uno. Just the two of us. It was really fun. He's getting so big. He lost his first tooth last night. To me, that makes him seem much bigger now than when he started Kindergarten a few weeks ago. Can my baby really be old enough to lose a tooth?! Where has the time gone? Really. 

It's hard to see his missing tooth in this picture, but I love his face. The new gap on the bottom in the front, of course.

Kaia is going on a field trip today to Logan Canyon and to say she is excited is a HUGE understatement. Her teacher this year is just absolutely perfect for her. They are kindred spirits. She truly loves and encourages Kaia's reading obsession and she's been doing a lot of Science with her class. Kaia is her biggest fan! It's so fun to hear about all of the cool things her teacher is doing. My Ms. Frizzle wish is growing and growing every year!

Beck and Kaia headed out the door to school. 

It's homecoming week at Gabe's high school and he went to the parade and powderpuff game last night. I picked him up afterwards and we had a great time laughing together as he told me about all the funny things that happened. I stopped at the gas station to fill up the van and he offered to buy me a treat. It was so sweet. I love talking and laughing with him. I'll give him a ride home any time just for that reason. I love that he is happy.  (Mostly happy, after all, he is 15!)

Zoe has a new friend she met at school and it turns out she only lives a couple blocks away! How cool is that? I met her friend and her Mom last night. They seem really nice. I like this friend for Zoe because she's still enjoying being 12. Not into boys yet, still wanting to play outside and well, just PLAY! Zoe is so much like that and I hope she can enjoy every last second of being "little". I loved hearing about their nature walk and all of their "big plans" for having different fashion themes each week and wearing matching colors at school. It made me smile. The 12 year old inside of me is still very much alive and kicking and I wonder if she'll ever realize she's almost 39... in some ways, I hope not.

Speaking of being 12 though.... in some ways, I guess I really need to grow up. But I'm really not sure how -- that is why I still must be 12 inside, because sometimes my heart hurts SO much about silly little things. Sometimes I get SO mad about things. Sometimes I just want to be little again and not have all of the silly grown-up problems. 

I was talking to my girls the other day about some girls that weren't being so nice to them at school. Nothing major, just mean girls giving them dirty looks. You know the "eye to toes and back up to your eyes -- Oh, you're no threat to me" kind of look? Yeah. I hate that. I told them just to smile at those girls and don't ever give them a second thought. Ever. I told them to brush it off and be strong, because Guess What? There are STILL "girls" like that who are my age. Yuck.

Anyway, I'm just always feeling like I don't fit it anywhere and maybe I don't, but the question is: WHY do I care? I just don't know. My season in life is here with family right now.  My kids and husband are where I invest most of my time and I know that is most important, but I always end up feeling left out. I always feel like I just walked in AFTER the punch line of everything. There seems to be a secret world out there that I've never been part of... (thank heavens for preschool -- they LOVE me! :)

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Have you ever read Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince? You know where Professor Slughorn alters his memories before he lets Professor Dumbledore see them? Well, I just altered my blog before EVERYONE reads it. I erased about 4 paragraphs of YUCK right here. It was just me complaining and being contentious. I need to go talk with the person I have an issue with directly, not vaguely hint around it on my blog. Sorry if you read it -- I don't want to be that kind of person! Anyway, good luck finding the horcruxes and all that...

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I know it's just Satan trying to bring me down, but I also know having good and bad experiences so EXTREME in one day is a reminder to me there are areas in my life I really need to do better in. I need to LOVE people, to see them as God sees them, and not to let them bother me so much. There is good in everyone. I truly believe that. I think the good gets clouded by assumptions and jealousy and their own feelings of insecurity or even just stress and fatigue. 

I have so many awesome people in my life and I'm going to focus on them. People that seem to like me for the moment and I'll take it! I want be humble and kind to everyone around me, regardless of how they treat me. It's easy to love someone that loves you, right? But I want to love the ones who don't. That's going to be my focus. I worry about realizing this goal and saying it "out loud". I've prayed about it and now I know the tests will come! I hope I'm ready...

I just think I get along better with my own family (wow, that is an awesome realization, isn't it!!!) and of course, my cats. This is our new addition, Churro. His favorite hiding spot is inside the shoe bench. He is just absolutely adorable. Really. I cannot help it. I love this guy! He has THE cutest little meow.

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened." ~ Anatole France

"Grace for Mother Duck and Me" -- my wake-up call

I should be vacuuming and cleaning the litter boxes right now... really. It's on my list today, but for *some* reason it just doesn't sound very enjoyable. Hold on, readers, this is a LONG one!

Sometimes we all have to take a minute (or 12) and do something good for ourselves. Breathe. Think. Type. Relax. I've been running on empty the last week or so. What a blur! School is in full force. Late nights, early mornings, schedules and deadlines, school lunch and homework. You know it's crazy, but I really do like most of it. I think. Today I do.

I've had a LOT of experiences these last couple weeks to help me learn patience, compassion, humility, forgiveness, charity, and love. I wonder if I'll every really figure things out.

This was a rough draft post I started last week, but never finished:

"Why is life so hard? Yeah, I know that sounds really dramatic. I know most people would look at my life and say, "What's your problem, whiner?!?!?!!" (And they might be true -- sort of.) The fact is, most people don't share what their life is REALLY like. Their inner struggles and day to day problems. Weaknesses that I can never seem to get over. Problems I always seem to find myself in. When will I ever learn?"

Life really isn't that bad -- I was just having "one of those days" -- I always seem to think every little upset in my universe will be irreversible and permanent. I don't like that about myself. It's rather exhausting.

I'm so thankful for second chances and prayer and being able to talk to people. We had some serious issues with some of Gabe's friends a couple weeks ago and I'm so glad things are calming down. I'm thankful for time. Time to think and time to heal. What I thought would be devastating with long-lasting consequences, ended up being something rather trivial, but something that brought Gabe and I closer together. He was more mature and patient about the whole thing than I was. I wish I could say more, but he has asked me not to.

I had another very "silly" incident with a friend and some unspoken rules and well, after some awkward moments of disagreement, we both ended up laughing when we realized where the other person was coming from.

And then again with some more of my children's friends and their parents....

One thing's for sure: this world is full of all sorts of people. No two people act or think exactly alike. Yet, why do we always look at someone and think they are just like "so and so". Do you know what I mean?

I read this great little story last week in the throes of the constant "Is it ME or THEM?" doubts in my mind:

Let me just preface this by saying (because I'm so ridiculously childish and prideful, I guess) that I don't agree with the author judging the mother duck -- she doesn't know any better. That part, I just didn't get. Poor Mother Duck -- where is she SUPPOSED to walk her ducklings amidst all the subdivisions and humans taking over all of the undeveloped land?? That's another blog post entirely.

However, I TOTALLY understood what she was saying, because I have wrongly judged SO many women SO many times. I was truly ashamed when I read this. I have been there. I know how she feels. She's better than I am, really, only to judge a duck's misguided actions, rather than a person. Sometimes, they don't know any better either. I should have as much natural compassion for other people as I do for some random duck! But alas, I am a strange girl.

Have you ever looked at someone and thought, even for a moment, 
"She doesn't deserve to be a mother." 
Well, read on:

(photo from National Geographic)

From the August 2013 Ensign:

Grace for Mother Duck and Me by Rosie Kaufman

One spring afternoon I was packing my car to begin shuttling my five young children to and from lessons and practices. As I loaded soccer cleats and dance bags, I noticed a mother duck and her ducklings waddling down the sidewalk of our suburban neighborhood.

As I watched, she began to cross the road. Unfortunately, she chose a gutter grate for her crosswalk, and as she passed over it, her babies followed. Four of her ducklings slipped helplessly between the bars of the grate.

When the mother reached the other side, she realized she was missing some of her little ones and could hear their muffled peeps. Totally oblivious of her mistake, she crossed back across the drainage grate, looking for her missing ducklings and losing two more. With horror and some disgust at her poor judgment, I went to the grate to see if I could lift it. Although I used all my strength, the grate barely budged, and I was late to pick up one of my kids.

Figuring I would have to fix the situation later when I wasn’t so rushed, I hopped in the car while muttering self-righteously, “She doesn’t deserve to be a mother.”

During the next hour and a half, I made many of my recurring parenting mistakes. These are mistakes I have begged forgiveness for many times from both my children and my Father in Heaven. Each time I resolve to do better and not to fall prey to these weaknesses again. When I snapped at one of my kids for teasing another, my words echoed loudly in my ears, “She doesn’t deserve to be a mother.”

Suddenly I felt overwhelming compassion for that mother duck. She was trying to navigate the world with the instincts she was given, just as I was. But sometimes those instincts simply weren’t enough, and it was our children who suffered.

I resolved to get the grate off somehow and lift the ducklings out. As I rounded the corner to our street, I saw a small group gathered. My neighbor had lifted the grate, climbed inside the drainage tunnel, and was gently lifting the ducklings out to safety. The frightened little birds scrambled to find their mother, who was pacing nervously in a nearby bush. She hadn’t asked for help, but my neighbor had stepped in when her protection was simply not enough. I was overcome with emotion as I thought of the Savior doing the same for my children and me.

Sometimes we come up short, even when we have the best intentions and try our hardest. However, the Savior’s “grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before [Him]” (Ether 12:27). It comforts me to know that my shortcomings will not ruin my children and that they will be the recipients of love, peace, understanding, and grace from our Savior. He “reaches my reaching”¹ and wants my family and me to succeed. Our shortcomings will not prevail when we humble ourselves and stand with the Lord by our side.

I really love this story. I mean, I'm a HUGE animal lover, if you didn't know, so I was crying tears of joy when all the ducklings were returned safely to their worried mommy. But it really helped me feel more compassion and understanding for others. Actually, I feel like it was a great big (loving!) slap in the face from my Heavenly Father saying, "Lacy, stop being so MEAN! Stop thinking everyone is so wrong and take a look in the mirror. I love you and I know your struggles, but others are struggling too. Help them, don't judge them."

We do NOT know what others are going through. We cannot judge anyone because we don't have all of the information. We can never truly understand why someone does something. Sometimes my greatest struggles are on the inside and I always wonder what other people are truly going through when they act a certain way or say something I think they shouldn't have or whatever. 

I don't know who said it, but I love the quote that says something like: 

"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

We're all in this together (yes, I did get that from High School Musical, if you must know)! But we really are and I want to try harder to help and lift others -- even when they might not return the favor. 

I feel like I am being tested to the limit lately in terms of my capacity to love and to serve and to have patience for others. I often wonder what the future holds...

I'm so thankful for a loving Father in Heaven who judges me perfectly and is always there to help me be better and make up for my many shortcomings.

P.S. I know I've already told you about the FlyLady, but I'm going to tell you again, because she makes me happy! :) If you feel overwhelmed with your life and your house is in total CHAOS... go to her site IMMEDIATELY, sign up for the emails, and start to FLY! It's been such a blessing in my life.

M.O.M. (Mom Operating Manual)

The kids and I got this book from the library the other day...

I think I enjoyed it more than they did, but seriously, it is so funny!

I think younger kids might not "get" it -- in fact, a lot of the reviews on Goodreads said so, but my older 3 especially LOVED it. It's nothing to be taken seriously -- that's not the point. We had a lot of fun reading it together and laughing at so many things we found similar to what goes on at our house. It's definitely one of our new favorites!

I think it would make a fun gift for a Mom who is right in the middle of the chaos we call Parenthood. We all need a good laugh, right? When writing this post, though, I realized the reason I find this book so funny may be because I am PAST a lot of the little people chaos. I survived, and now it's funny... mostly.

I especially enjoyed the "Troubleshooting" section highlighting certain auditory signals that may indicate minor malfunctions with your Mom: 

Heavy Sighing -- possible cause: Are you abusing your access to the duct tape? Quick fix: STOP it!

Groaning -- possible cause: Did you forget to flush the toilet again? Quick fix: Flush the toilet?

Snapping -- likely cause: You won't put your shoes on. Quick fix: Put your shoes on!

Eerie Silence -- likely cause: OVERLOAD. Quick fix: Call grandma!

Following in their Mother's "blogsteps"

Okay, so you may have noticed there are two new blogs on my profile:

Ask the Kat  (Kaia's blog)

and 

Fairy Tails and Mermaid Wings (Zoe's blog)

My sweet daughters have been watching me blog for years now and just last month decided they wanted to start their own blogs, so we did. Right now, I'm the administrator on them and we just figured out how to add Zoe as a contributing author. So the blogs are a work in progress for sure.

I'm really excited for them to have this creative outlet. They both love writing and they both have HUGE imaginations. It's been fun to help them get these blogs going. If you have a minute, go check them out -- I know they would just LOVE a comment or two.

My girls... :) Zoe (left) and Kaia (right)

Friends and Flylady to the rescue! Oh, and an ICE BUN!

Alright, since my last post about de-cluttering and not mending everything, I've been feeling a lot better about the whole situation.

For one thing -- I signed up for FLYLADY emails again. She's like a personal online coach for organizing and taking control of your life. I've been going through spurts of following her suggestions off and on since, oh, 2001? I think. Whenever I'm following her "flight plan" I ALWAYS feel better and my house looks better and feels better too. You should seriously check her out! It's really easy to do AND well, easy not to do, and that is my problem. I need to stick to it. Her daily emails can be quite overwhelming at first, but most of them are just testimonials and I don't always read all of them -- you'll soon figure out which ones you need to read. Here's my (super fancy) Flight Plan for each day. I took the Flylady's suggestions and modified it a bit to my needs:

Also, several friends on Facebook gave me some really good suggestions to help tackle the clutter and excess in my house. My friend, Tawnya, sent me this great article about the "time cost" of our stuff and it really hit home. The minimalist lifestyle is really big right now -- a lot of it is just TOO much for me to process, but like Tawnya suggested, you can study up on it and find a "comfortable spot" for your family. :) I like that. Like a thoughtful spot?? Ahhhh.

My friend, Sharon, (I'm quoting you, ok???) said:  "I came to a similar revelation within the last year - just how much time I spend managing all my stuff. I move it, I organize it, I clean it, I fix it all because WHY would I get rid of something that I might need someday?? I've been just purging through stuff like crazy and the things I've realized is 1) We have way more stuff than anyone needs 2) I have NOT missed anything 3) I use the stuff I keep a lot more because I can find it and have time to use it and 4) It gets easier to let go the more you do it."  

This was great for me to hear --- I can do it, I can do it. I especially LOVE #3. Everyone suggested, including my dear friend, Maggie, that I should start with clothes.

SO, Monday got crazy -- LOTS of kids here playing and me trying to focus on the kitchen (keeping my sink clean and shiny is one of the Flylady's best secrets). When I'm consistent with it, my house IS "magically" much neater. I wonder why? I think it's like the broken window effect -- but inside. When the family sees the kitchen undone (including me) they're much more likely to leave out this or pile up that. It's true. SHINE YOUR SINK EVERY DAY! (Meaning, you have to have ALL of your dishes washed so you can actually get to the bottom of your sink to clean it!)

Tuesday -- well, on Tuesday, we got a PIANO, but that's another story. (We're keeping it here for a friend for a long while and I'm just thrilled!) Thank you, Debbie!

So, Tuesday, we attacked the kids closets and dressers. I guess I should take pictures. It felt really good. We didn't get rid of a whole LOT (since we just moved in April and I'd gone through stuff), but we organized everything and the kids got to decide what clothes they like the most. I also made labels (really fancy with painters tape, ha ha) to put on their drawers.

Anyway, it made me feel REALLY good. It was actually fun! Kaia always enjoys this because she gets Zoe's hand-me-downs -- but then, we have to go through her things again. I'm feeling better: I have a plan and I have great friends and family -- there isn't anything else I need, right? Well, maybe some GUMPTION.

Let me just say: I can't believe how BIG my children are getting! Time is flying by....

I'm VERY proud of them -- we had a really good last week of summer and first day of school.

Gabe and I were at the highschool on Monday picking up his schedule. When we were crossing the road, Gabe said, "Wait, Mom, don't cross yet, didn't you see that truck?" I just looked over at him and smiled and he said, "Well, I don't want anything to happen to you, I kinda like you."  MADE MY DAY FOREVER! Yep. 

Oh, and this is really random, but SO awesome, I wanted to share: During June, Beck played T-ball and we were always SO HOT watching his games. One day, Zoe decided to take an ice cube out of the cooler and put it in her bun. GENIUS. It has been my go-to hairdo for anything outside this summer and definitely for yard work. Seriously, it really helps keep you cool and it doesn't melt for quite awhile. I took a picture of Zoe's "ICE BUN" to show you -- the ice is the white circle in the middle, but in reality, we usually bury it completely inside and close to our head. Try it! (I really REALLY don't like to be hot.)

Funny how it's almost September and since we moved in April, I've completely lost track of my 2013 Mantra: Balance, Exactness, Focus.

Well, it's never too late to start. At the end of every Flylady email, she says: "You are not behind! I don't want you to try to catch up; I just want you to jump in where we are. O.K.?" 

Let's GO!

Brain Dump... Deja vu? Wait... a BREAKTHROUGH!

I think I already have a post somewhere titled, "Brain Dump".

I shouldn't blog sometimes, really. Today I woke up in a bit of a funk.

My mind is SO full. SO FULL.

There is just SO much to do, so much to remember, so much to plan, so much to even think about.

Not to mention all of the "stuff" that happens everyday that I don't expect or can't plan for... let's not even go into the crazy of all that!

I used to be better at taking one thing at a time and then, moving on to the next.

I'm not sure if I've lost that ability OR if there's just SO much to do... my brain is ready to explode. Seriously. I sit down to make a to-do list and I can vaguely decipher a flow of activity somewhere in the back of my brain. Much like a blender swirling with words and phone numbers and check lists and fuzzy clouds of ??? Just LOTS of fuzz really.

At the front of my brain, the part that is formulating and typing these words at this moment, there is just a clear, resounding FUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Like a low hum or a white noise that purposely? or thankfully? blocks out all of the swirling blender stuff. I can't seem to turn the FUZZ off any more.

Problem is: I desperately need to dive into that blender and deal with some of that stuff!

I woke up spouting off my to-do list to my husband this morning in between deep sighs of frustration and stress. Ever patient (patiently?), he listens and always has a good (if not always logical) strategy to attack my day. He's not a stay-at-home mom (obviously), so he just doesn't really get it, but he sure tries.

Today, however, I think he said something rather profound. I won't bore you with my BOOK of things I need to do/should do/could do/want to do/really have to do, because I know you have your own. Maybe our books are rather similar? Maybe not? Either way. Life is busy. Life as a mother at any phase, age, or number of children is BUSIER than ever.

Zeke was standing in our closet trying to get ready to go to work (bless his heart!) as I'm purging and pleading and well, basically, whining. We were talking about building more shelves in our closet, because, you know, that's what everyone needs right after they move into a bigger house, right? Seriously though, shelves for HIS clothes, because I have a huge basket and two boxes FULL of things that need to be mended and they're taking over our closet. What?? Yeah, it's embarrassing and rather ridiculous.

It's not that I don't mend -- I do -- every couple of months I take a day and just mend stuff. My kids usually end up wanting to sew something right along with me, which is good, but my overall progress is greatly diminished, but hey, I have kids that like to sew. That's a good thing in my book.

Anyway, the mending basket mysteriously multiplies overnight. Really! Just when I think I've made a dent, it's full again just a few days later.

Is it obvious to everyone, but me? Zeke simply said, "Don't mend. Just don't. In the grand scheme of things, mending does NOT matter. The kids have plenty of clothes. Prioritize what they really need and THROW THE REST AWAY." Isn't he a genius??

Inside though, I instantly recoiled at the thought... THROW THE REST AWAY????? What the? I can't.... WASTE something??? How do I define WASTING something? How can Zeke say that and be okay with it? It sounded SO lovely, SO simple, SO right. But.... THROW THE REST AWAY? I want to feel that way too.

For months (YEARS), I've been praying about how I can get it all done and how I can feel LESS stress. I've been thinking all morning about what Zeke said as I've been watering our lawn and doing laundry (YEAH, there's a wake-up call). Don't laugh, but I think I seriously have a hard time getting rid of stuff or just the idea of wasting stuff. I'm not sure if I've always been this way. Our house certainly isn't overflowing or anything, but the things I do to save stuff or get the good out of stuff *might* be considered a bit overboard by other people.

I mend clothes and blankets and things until they're literally falling apart between the seams! Among other things, I use THE ABSOLUTE LAST DROP of everything. Toothpaste, syrup, lotion, ketchup, etc. I know it drives my family crazy. It should. It's silly. I have bottles of stuff in the fridge and in the bathrooms turned upside down with the threat, "Don't throw that away yet, there's still some left!" SILLY!

What about the TIME I'm wasting saving those little things and making room for them? What I'm really doing is WASTING my time. My time is so precious. I can't buy time. I got mad at Kaia yesterday for throwing away a half-eaten apple. Yes, I totally agree we shouldn't waste food, but seriously over-reacted for sure. It's just an apple. She's my sweet daughter. I'm embarrassed to even tell you that.

You know, I go through a blog famine here and there and whenever I start again, I always feel so much better. It's very therapeutic. I hope my life of learning things the hard way helps someone else avoid my mistakes in the first place.

Today, I'm going to pray REALLY hard to let go of things that do not matter. Today, I'm going to try really hard to get rid of some things in my house. I'm especially going to re-evaluate my mending basket.

I read somewhere recently about getting rid of 5 things everyday for 5 days and doing that each month. Even little things. I'm going to try it.

P.S. Zeke, I love you more than anything... you are my DENSITY.

The end is near...

The end of summer, that is.

This summer has been a BLUR! Good and Bad and Crazy and calm??? Actually, I don't remember much of it being calm, but overall, it's been a good summer. We survived and for the most part, we're still smiling.

School starts in a week. My kids excitement level decreases greatly as their age increases.

Beck is starting Kindergarten -- he is SO excited, he can hardly sleep! He asks me everyday, "How many more days until I can go to school?" He talks about it all day long.

Kaia is starting 4th grade -- she's excited to see her friends, meet her new teacher, go the school library,  and of course, go to recess!

Zoe is starting 7th grade -- she's excited to see her friends, sort of...

Gabe is starting 10th grade -- he's... um, "school, what? at least I got new shoes, right?"

I'm excited, I am. I'm not gonna lie. It's time. We've had a good time together going to the park and the library and swimming lessons and playgroup and the splash pads. We've spent a lot of the time organizing and enjoying our new house. We rode the bus one day just for "fun". (It was fun for about the first 5 minutes, but it was an adventure!) We made a fire pit in our backyard and have enjoyed roasting marshmallows and string cheese and grasshoppers and...  yeah. We have improved their cooking skills (their request) and cleaning skills (MY request). And we have done a LOT of yard work, but I've really enjoyed it.

I'm not a big fan of the sun. In fact, I really don't like it at all. It makes me very ill every time I go out in it for more than, well, about 5 minutes. Really. So that's hard to work around. My kids have learned to adapt. We stay in the shade or we don't go outside. We've been playing board games quite a bit this summer -- strange, I know, but it's been fun. Our favorites? Monopoly and Killer Bunnies (I'm using the term "favorites" VERY loosely).

Our favorite inside activity though, would have to be reading. We've cuddled up with more than a few books this summer. Well, my kids have. I can't seem to focus... I've been working on "The Lost Hero" by Rick Riordan nearly all summer and I just finished it last week. It's really good -- it just isn't captivating? I don't know what's happened to me... I used to LOVE LOVE LOVE a good YA Sci-Fi/Fantasy. I still do, but I find myself being drawn to memoirs and even just fictions that are a bit more realistic. Huh. I hope I'm not growing up too much... maybe it's a phase...well, I'm forcing myself to plow through "Son of Neptune" and on through that series. My kids love that one -- they're waiting for me to catch up so we can discuss it. :) Awwww.

We also did our traditional Summerfest day (arts festival) and Cache County Fair adventure. 

I think this ride was called "Dizzy Dragons" or something... so fun! Beck is on the far right, with Kaia next to him, and our friend Monique next to Kaia. (Random girl next to Monique... Beck says she is their new best friend. Ok.)

Oh, one more VERY important thing to note:

This is a CHURRO... the really YUMMY kind from the fair. My friend, Rose, and her family makes them. Rose is Monique's mom. This one has dulce de leche filling (like caramel, but WAY BETTER.)

And this IS Churro (He found his way to our house and well... he's just too adorable.) 

He's our newest family member.

The kids and I think his fur looks like it's sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar and his eyes are truly the color of dulce de leche. (I need to post a picture of his eyes). Yep, it's official, we're crazy. 

And it's official: We have the legal limit of cats per household in our city. 4. 

4 kids, 4 cats -- my kids think we are now complete.

More on summer later...

Time to organize a few more drawers and boxes before school starts (as in, I really need to find my social security card -- I'm teaching preschool this Fall -- I start next week! -- and my employer needs a copy of it.)

It's "MEOW or NEVER" (saw that on Facebook!)

P.S. Kaia chose my new background -- it really goes with our houseful of CATS! It's kinda hurting my eyes, but I'll keep it for awhile.

We're really just a couple of psychos playing 'house'

Not sure why, but my blog famine is possibly coming to an end.

I just have more to say than I feel like posting on a Facebook status. You know, I took a month long vacation from Facebook back in February/March and it was rather lovely. I don't like Facebook. Once I get on, I get sucked in... it's just so, so... I don't know exactly, but I always come away from it feeling rather depressed.

My mind is ALWAYS so full it is utterly exhausting.

We've been in our new house a month and two days now. It's been a blur.

Favorite things about my house? The pantry and the bathtub and all of our wonderful new neighbors! :)

I've noticed that I feel more settled here when I'm doing mundane and random things... mending clothes, making soup, bathing my kids...

I know it's very cliche and rather ridiculous of me to say NOW rather than a month or a year ago, but it REALLY and truly does NOT matter where you live. It will not magically change your life. I didn't think it would. I just think some people think it does. The trick is to make the most of what you have, you know, "bloom where you're planted" and all that.

Okay, so each of our kids have their own rooms... do they still have trouble going to sleep at night? YES. Do they still have trouble getting along? YES.

I do love our kitchen... lots of room to move around and be together and not in each other's way. :)

There are changes going on in our family that have nothing to do with where we live, but what is going on in our lives. We are together and we are learning and growing -- that will happen anywhere. What a journey it has been!

All I know is I'm tired and I can't sleep very well here yet... it doesn't quite feel like home yet and I'm not sure why...

I think moving in the middle (or really during the last month) of school has made it very difficult. So many transitions, but still lots of homework and a busy schedule.

I'm looking forward to summer. I want to sleep in and well, just sleep.

I want to plant a tree or twelve. I miss my trees... so much.

Last weekend, Zeke's Aunt and Uncle came to visit us (Gosh, we've been married 17 years, I suppose they are MY Aunt and Uncle too! :) The first in our family to come see the new house. It felt good to have family here. It felt a little more like home. They are so wonderful and inspiring. They always make us feel better about ourselves and our efforts.

Barb and Clyde, I love you both SO much. Thank you for coming to see us and being so good to us! (and of course I forgot to take pictures)

My favorite quote of the week, possibly of the YEAR (I'm not kidding) is when Zeke told Barb and Clyde that "we're really just a couple of psychos playing 'house'". It's true. More than anyone will ever know.

I love you, Zeke. I'm so thankful to have you along for this crazy ride. :)

P.S. Here's a picture of the cute fruit basket, goodie display/holder thingy Barb and Clyde gave to us as a house-warming gift. It was filled with yummy treats, but this is AFTER my children got to most of them.

Rely on the Lord

Have you noticed I haven't been blogging this week? Yeah... it's been a crazy week. I think I say that more than I don't so it doesn't really mean anything. (Reminds me of the "Incredibles" when the Mom says, "Everyone's special, Dash." and Dash says, "Which is another way of saying no one is." Yeah, I'm way off...) 

The younger kids are in bed. We celebrated Friday in style eating lots of ice cream and watching, "Ramona and Beezus." It has to be one of my new favorite movies. My Mom sent it to us for a Valentine's surprise. I was surprised how much I really enjoyed it. It just felt real. It made me laugh and cry and laugh and cry some more. Kaia is SO much like Ramona. I always felt like Ramona when I was growing up.

Zeke and my oldest son, Gabe, are sleeping in snow caves somewhere up the canyon with the Scouts... why they do this I will never understand, but they enjoy it.

So now comes the hard part. The house is quiet and I am "alone". Well, not really alone, the cats are sleeping nearby, but the house is SO quiet. TOO quiet. No more distractions to keep my mind busy.

What a week and what a finale! Crazy house stuff: flooring choices, meetings with all the builders and "big wigs", deadlines and delays, a broken window, and not-so-thorough bricklayers. Poor Beck has a double ear infection which means we didn't get much sleep, Parent/Teacher Conferences for Kaia and Gabe, my husband and I were so busy we barely saw each other at all. Oh, and one of our cats has been sick and had to go to the vet and the engine light on our van keeps coming on and we can't figure out why... almost sounds like the lyrics to a REALLY bad country song.

We tried to go out for dinner last night and it was a bit crazy. I was worn out, because of all of the above and more, physically and emotionally. Well, it wasn't the best Valentine's Day ever, but it wasn't the worst; after all, we did have sushi! Then, to top it off, I got sick later that night -- I've never gotten sick from sushi. Well, that won't stop me from eating it again!!

Today is a blur.

Before I put the kids to bed, we read a little verse and quote from "Stand a Little Taller" by Gordon B. Hinckley. It was the perfect quote and scripture for today. My heart needed it.

RELY ON THE LORD

"And by hearkening to observe all the words which I, the Lord their God, shall speak unto them, they shall never cease to prevail until kingdoms of the world are subdued under my feet, and the earth is given unto the saints, to possess it forever and ever." Doctrine & Covenants 103:7

"The Lord has given you this glorious Church. His Church, to guide you and direct you, to give you opportunity for growth and experience, to teach you and lead you and encourage you, to make of you His chosen daughter or son, one upon whom He may look with love and with a desire to help. Of course there will be some problems along the way. There will be difficulties to overcome. But they will not last forever. He will not forsake you." ~ Gordon B. Hinckley