Just some random thoughts and TWO major announcements!

Hello out there, I haven't been blogging much lately. I was just enjoying my friend's blog, Thoughts and then some, and thought I would pop over to mine and see if I felt any little blogging urges of my own.

We're just sitting here all cuddled up watching "Fantastic Four" -- kind of a random movie... but we all like superhero stuff and it's really hard to find a movie that 4 kids ranging in age from 6 to 16 all enjoy. I like Mr. Fantastic, he reminds me of  my sweetie, Zeke.

Can I just tell you how grateful I am for my friends? We were able to attend the baptism of my friend's son this morning and it was such a great day. I was just sitting there all warm and fuzzy inside, just enjoying being with everyone and realizing how special these fabulous women are to me. I hope I'm not too needy, but I feel like they are my adopted sisters in a way... I'll try not to suffocate you guys too much, but man, I love you! They know the real me, you know, I'm FINE (Freaked out, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional) and for some reason, they put up with me and even seem to like me and laugh at my dumb jokes.

Well, I don't know if anyone out there enjoys my blog, but I do. It is SO fun to go back and see what we were doing last summer or two Christmases ago... I guess a journal can do that too, but it's just fun to see the pictures with it and to read all the funny stuff my kids say that usually gets forgotten by the time I do a journal entry. So many things I'd forgotten -- I was reminded today how important it is to me to take time to blog.

Well, as for the TWO MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENTS! Yes, I guess I like to be dramatic and no, it's nothing new if you're my friend on Facebook, but I haven't put them on my blog yet.

Wow, I'm not sure which one to share first -- both are quite extraordinary!

okay, #1 -- WE GOT A DOG!!!!!!! :) I've wanted a dog since Gabe was 5 and well, the planets aligned and now, our family has grown by one.

Meet Odin:

He is THE sweetest little dog. We are absolutely smitten with him. We adopted him from the local shelter. He's about 2 years old and a the shelter says he's a Jack Russell? terrier?/chihuahua? mix (anyway, a little mutt. :)

LIFE CHANGING! 

Even the cats don't mind... too much.

and #2 -- it's been 15 YEARS, but I'm going back to school in just 23 days. (I'm just a *little* excited.) I'm going to get a Bachelor's Degree in Biology. You know my Miss Frizzle dream??? Well, I'm going to make it come true. I went to the store today to get school supplies for my kids and I realized I needed some for myself! I was so giddy I might have squealed just a bit. :)

Anyway.... until later. 

PS Little random dinner ideas -- we've been making grilled cheese sandwiches, but with mozzarella cheese, a bit of pizza sauce, and pepperoni -- like a Pizza sandwich. It's really good! Also, Beck suggested one day we should spread salsa on our grilled ham and cheese sandwiches and guess what? They were YUMMY.  

Third time's the charm: three great books you need to read!

I keep having the overwhelming feeling I need to share these three books with you. They are all very special to me for different reasons. I've read them over the last few months and I know you will enjoy them.

The first book is called: 

"Covenant Motherhood" 
by Stephanie Dibb Sorensen

This is a great book! Honestly, I usually don't like books about Motherhood. I hate them actually. They usually leave me feeling very depressed and even more like a total failure than I felt before I read the book. I'm not like other mothers and my children just aren't like other children. No one can realistically measure up to the expectations of the motherhood books I've read before --not to mention an LDS motherhood book! No way! I've made it a point to steer clear.  UNTIL THIS BOOK. Why? Well, quite frankly, I'm very privileged to know the author personally and well, she is nothing short of  awesome. (Seriously!) She is so real and honest in this book. I love her insight and personal stories. She is very funny in a sarcastic kind of way (my favorite kind of way).

This book is THE FIRST book about motherhood that actually made me feel BETTER about what I'm doing and why I am doing it. I was a bit intimidated by the subtitle of the book, "Reflecting the Role of Christ in our Lives." (as well as the title), I was sure I'd never measure up, but I thought, "It has to be good, Stephanie wrote it. I'll at least give it a try." She was able to help me understand how important everything I do as a mother truly is -- from loving and teaching my children, to washing the dishes and changing dirty diapers (yes!). She helped me to feel enabled and exalted simply because I am a mother. I felt Christ's love for me and my ability to share that love with my children as I care for them. Why? In many instances, I'm ALREADY DOING the things she says are Christ-like. Wow!! Talk about a self-esteem booster!!! You mean, what I'm doing is enough? It is! As we are prayerful and have the right attitude and give it our best effort,  we are serving our children in the same manner Christ serves all of us. It is so inspiring! I really cannot convey how beautifully she explains it. I have felt such a great peace since reading this book. Thank you, Stephanie!

If you want to read more about Motherhood and how cool Stephanie is, you can check out her blog at: Diapers and Divinity

Okay, the second book is called:

"My Walk Thru Heaven" by Kim Rives

This is one of those books that really takes you by surprise. It's a life beyond death experience that will inspire you to love more and forgive freely. She is such an amazing person! I am truly inspired by her ability to forgive others. She has been through so much in her life. Her story is about her fight against cancer. I felt very connected to her because of my sister and her own fight against cancer (sadly, my sister lost that battle in February 2005). 

I don't want to say too much about the story to give away all the details -- you have to read it for yourself. I will say it left me feeling closer to the Savior than ever before and with an increased desire to be a better person. One of the more light-hearted parts of the story is the song she writes after one of her visits to her doctor -- it made me laugh right out loud. Kim has a great sense of humor in spite of all that she has been through -- it may even be part of what helped her through it. 

Ironically, as with Stephanie, I also know Kim personally. She is a member of my ward and she is simply AMAZING -- so kind and loving, her smile radiates a glow around her entire being. I love to talk with her and hear her sing. She is an angel here on earth and I am so grateful to know her. It is no coincidence that Heavenly Father put her in my life at this time. She has helped me to feel His peace and to find joy in my life. Thank you, Kim!

To learn more about Kim and her story, you can go to:

Kim Rives

Finally, the third book is called:

"When Life Gets Hard" by Meg Johnson

Kim Rives is the one who introduced me to this great book and I'm so thankful she let me borrow her copy. Now, I don't know Meg personally, but I would love to meet her! Several friends of mine DO know her and she is also AMAZING! Why is it amazing people have been through so much?

Helen Keller once said, "Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved."

I would consider Meg a person of extraordinary character considering the trials and suffering she has been through (though I'm told by a friend of mine who went to high school with her she was ALREADY amazing before her accident!)

For a sneak peek of this book, here is the blurb on the book jacket (What are those called?):

"You wanted more. You got less.
You wanted this. You got that.
You wanted there. You got here.
You already know that things in life don’t go exactly as planned.
And sometimes they go terribly, terribly wrong . . . .

You already know that things in life don't go exactly as planned. And sometimes they go terribly, terribly wrong ...

Meg Johnson came to this life-changing realization seven years ago when she fell off a cliff in Southern Utah - a fall that left her a quadriplegic in a wheelchair. And though she sits for the rest of her mortal life, she stands tall with a message for her brothers and sisters of all abilities. When life gets too hard to stand, just keep on rollin'!

In this motivating and inspiring talk, When Life Gets Hard ..., motivational speaker and author Meg Johnson shares insights from her life that will make you laugh, cry, and rest assured that when your life gets tough, you, too, can keep on rollin'!"

Wow!! She definitely KEEPS ON ROLLIN'! Her book is so inspiring. Yes, she fell of a cliff and became paralyzed, but she talks about how much more devastating SPIRITUAL PARALYSIS is and more importantly, HOW TO AVOID IT!

I love books that tell you in exact detail how to do something (do this, then this, and this). She talks about avoiding and closing up Satan's gaps and holes along our path of life that can trap us and leave us spiritually paralyzed. She teaches us about the importance of 

GAPS

(Gratitude-Attitude-Prayer-Service)

vital tools to keep us safe from Satan's influence in our life. This book is such a fun read. I mean, it's absolutely horrible to think of what happened to her and all that she went through. I cried for her. I cried for me and my own ungratefulness in my truly blessed life. I need to do better and look at all the blessings that are everywhere around me. One of my favorite parts was her telling about a time when it was raining and she fell out of her wheelchair and found herself on the ground in a puddle with a frail old lady trying to help her up. I love how she told the story. Meg's honesty and humor is truly enjoyable and comes through in her writing. Thank you, Meg, I hope to meet you someday!

You can read more about Meg on her blog: 

Meg Johnson Speaks

and you can also follow her on Facebook (she just had a baby!)
I hope you can find these books at your library or find them online. I want to get a copy of each to add to my personal library. I also think any one of these would make a great gift!
HAPPY READING!

Best News Ticker Ever

One of my favorite quotes ever is from Thomas S. Monson:

 "The Lord is in the details of our life." 

I love this quote simply because I know it is true.  He is aware of us -- each of us. He know us personally and helps us individually. I'm constantly amazed and humbled by the way He answers my prayers and the fact that He does.

Without getting too personal, I also wanted to share a simple concept I'm learning more and more lately:

Return good for evil.

When people are inconsiderate or even outright cruel, I find great peace in showing them kindness instead of revenge or anger. I wish I could tell you the AWESOME experience I had last week. Basically, the Spirit told me to do something nice for someone I was very upset with. I didn't like the way she was treating me and the things she had been saying. When confronted by her, the Spirit literally spoke to me to do something nice. I did and the results were nothing short of MIRACULOUS! She smiled, I smiled, AND... those feelings of hurt completely and instantly went away.

I am determined not to let all the mean and grumpy people bring me down!

I'm learning more and more that forgiveness is an action on MY part. Not just saying sorry (and definitely not waiting for the other person to apoligize -- that may never happen), but actually DOING something to make amends. Ahhhh. My heart feels good. :)

I was in the temple yesterday and I had to wait awhile before they could take me in to do the ordinance. It was no coincidence to me when a very special person just happened to be there yesterday and we got to visit while we waited together. I just met her recently and she is becoming a great friend. What an amazing lady!! I'll have to write a blog post about her. 

Anyway, about half way through the ordinances, I suddenly became very antsy and felt the need to check the clock. I carpool with another good friend for our little Kindergartners and I knew I had at least another 20 minutes before I had to leave. However, this feeling wouldn't go away and I kept feeling like I need to leave sooner. After about 5 more minutes, I couldn't ignore the feeling any longer, so I told the temple workers I had to leave early. I got to my locker and the Spirt prompted me immediately, "Check your phone!" 

Now, when I tell you the Spirit "spoke to me" or "prompted me" -- it's like a sound recording in my head of my voice, but it's playing in the back of my mind. You know when you watch the news on TV and there's a news ticker running along the bottom of the screen with the latest updates and developing stories and such? I've finally learned that's what the promptings of the Holy Ghost are like to me. I have this special "news ticker" flash across the back of my mind whenever the Spirit is trying to tell me something. I just have to focus on the voice I hear and I can literally "see" that ticker through my mind. 

So back to the story -- I check my phone (in the locker room/dressing room of the temple -- weird I know, but the Spirit told me to). There was a text from my carpool friend sent much earlier saying she wouldn't be able to pick up Beck today and hoped I could. WOW!! Of course I could because the Spirit told me to leave the temple early. It was amazing! Such a simple thing, but I'm so grateful. I was able to pick up Beck right on time and another little girl that I pick up also. It worked out perfectly. 

Now, I know nothing terrible would have happened if I didn't listen to this prompting. I probably would have been about 10-15 minutes late picking up Beck. The teachers probably would have taken him to the office to wait for me and then try to call me, but I'm just so grateful he didn't have to worry or be afraid. I'm SO thankful I didn't have to feel stressed about being late and getting there in a hurry. It was just so comforting to me to KNOW Heavenly Father is aware of me and my family and our life.

How could we ever go wrong if we ALWAYS listened to the promptings of the Holy Ghost?

How can we ALWAYS make sure we are listening?

I want to make sure my life isn't too busy to hear these promptings. I need to slow down and be aware of what's going on and what the Spirit is trying to tell me. I need to make time in my life to act on those promptings. The Lord IS in the details of our life. We need to listen to what He wants us to do.

Another good friend in our new ward made me this beautiful necklace last week! I KNOW she was listening to the Spirit. She had no idea the week I'd had or all of things on my mind that day. I was really feeling down. She somehow knew I needed a friend and stopped by to cheer me up and see how I was doing. There wasn't anything terribly wrong, but I just needed the reassurance there are people out there who care about me. Thank you!

The little stones surrounding the eternity symbol are all of our birthstones (my children, Zeke, and me). I LOVE it! By the way, can you see the little cat scratch just above the edge of my shirt on the right? That's how you know it's ME. I love those crazy fur-balls. 

I know there are people out there who need our help and our friendship. We need to pray for guidance to know who they are and what they need. We can be instruments in God's hands in answering the prayers of another.

Another favorite quote,  

"A coincidence is a small miracle in which God chooses to remain anonymous."

The world is still full of so much good. We need to look for it and ADD to it. 

Wasn't planning to bleed today...

Sometimes I just HAVE to write. Sometimes I can't function any more until I do. I have to drop whatever I'm doing and just write down what's in my head until my head feels clear. Get it out. Write it down. Let it come alive on paper. Let my mind utilize that space for new thoughts. Today is one of those days. 

I have SO much to do. I always do. Today especially. Last week I substituted at my friend's preschool 6 hours a day for 2 days, so I'm a bit behind on other things. 

It's okay though. I honestly enjoyed it. I was a bit tired by Friday evening, but I made it. The kids are absolutely ADORABLE. Really. The best part is, I got to take Beck with me. ;)

My friend has asked me to teach next year three days a week and just half a day. I'm so excited! I think it will be a great fit for my life right now in lots of ways. I really enjoy the kids and look forward to the teaching experience if I'm ever to become the "Ms. Frizzle" I want to be.

It's so fun to see kids at the preschool that I know their families as well. I can see their parent's facial expressions and mannerisms through them. How they stand and what they say and how they scrunch up their nose when they talk or smile. So amazing! I also got two special pictures drawn just for me -- Thanks, Jack and Keegan!

____________________________

I'm still working on the quilt. Since January 26th is past, I'm shooting for February 1st :)

I'm so close. Last week, I remembered why I don't sew as much as I'd like and why I always stop in the middle of a project: 3 of my finger tips cracked on both sides of my nails. It is SO painful. I had to take a few days off to let them heal up again. Zeke says I always sew in the winter too -- he's right -- and there may be a correlation there since my hands are already dry. Oh, it's discouraging, but I'm not giving up!

__________________________

Got my first "Bountiful Basket" on Saturday. Thanks, Nicole, for the suggestion!! I know I'm behind on that, but wow, it was fun and I look forward to the next one. Pineapple and watermelon in January? Okay!

_________________________

Our house is *almost* done. Seriously. They are mudding, taping, and painting this week. Then, comes the flooring, lighting, interior doors, cabinets, exterior siding, brick...

It sounds like a lot, but it's going SO fast. 

Isn't it funny how you start something and you think it's going to take SO long? 

Then, you look back and it wasn't very long at all.

We've lived in this little apartment for SEVEN months! Wow. 

And now, in 5 or 6 weeks (hopefully) we'll move again.

We are SO blessed and I know it is a miracle from God.

I'm SO excited. I don't care how much we get moved in that first day, but when they give us the keys, the kids and I have decided we are taking sleeping bags and toothbrushes and spending the night on the floor if we have to. It's been an amazing adventure and to come this far and realize we're closer as a family than we were before we started? Even better. :)

Here's me in our freshly sheet-rocked kitchen! 

___________________________

Another idea... Do you think someone can be too nice? I try to be nice to everyone. EVERYONE. Sincerely nice. I do. However, the last 10 years or so, the thought keeps creeping into the back of my mind that you CAN be too nice. I'm afraid sometimes I'm TOO nice. Not in a good way.

The last few years or so (as in, ever since I got on Facebook in 2008), this "too nice" thing has become more and more apparent. I'm friendly. I know a LOT of people from high school, college, church, my children's school, our neighborhood, etc. I like people. I love friends. I love to share positive things that lift people up. I love to laugh. I love sarcasm and inside jokes. I love making other people laugh. 

Lately though, there's been a person that continually puts negative comments on my Facebook and well, it's just become obnoxious. I've had family members send me private messages saying, "What's up with so-and-so? What's her problem?" The comments have been so childish and out of line I actually feel embarrassed for her. They try to sound "NICE" like, well, "if it was me I would NEVER do that, but you know, if that works for you", but NO, it's RUDE.

Comments about my children and their choices and appearance. REALLY? And our house. Oh, our house! Seriously, I should not be made to feel guilty because we are able to build this house. It is a huge blessing and miracle for us. Zeke worked hard to finish school and was blessed to get a really good job. The pictures and posts I share on Facebook are for family and friends that love and support us and want to see the progress.

I'm certain not everyone likes what we're doing or approves of it, (and that's okay) but THANK YOU for not saying so. Seriously. 

The really sad thing is, this person, was, I thought, a really good friend of mine. SO "top-notch" in my book if I had a "100 favorite people list" she would have been on it, but over the last few years, (I can actually pinpoint it to a specific day), she has changed. Poisoned by jealousy. Prone to excessive negative criticism about everything we do and/or don't do. It's not my idea of a friend. Not at all.

I had a really good talk with my husband on Sunday. Um, he's wonderful, by the way. Seriously, wonderful. I'm SO thankful to have him in my life. 

Anyway, long story short. He suggested I "unfriend" her. (Who knew that would be an almost universally recognized term 10 years ago??) Wow. That's BIG for me. I'm always trying to be "too nice", trying to avoid conflict, trying to put up with people being "not nice" and trying to tell myself "they're probably right" and "I must deserve it somehow". But you know, when he said that and I considered it... I felt a great peace. It's okay. I deserve better. So I did it. Negative thoughts and feelings? Gone. Wow.

This year is going to be a good one. 

Balance, Exactness, Focus

"Garden Flowers" Appliques

 I did it! The flower appliques are on.
I used Wonder Under to fuse the appliques to the quilt.
I'm also going to stitch around the edge of each flower and center.

 The flowers really add to the overall look of the quilt.
Again, I LOVE the colors! 

Now, for the trim. :)

If you're just tuning in, I'm making this quilt for my dear friend, Tawnya.
She is an amazing writer. Her blog is: Drawn to the Flame. You should go check it out!

Two Conversions

How's your Tuesday? I'm pretty good, I guess. I have to speak in church on Sunday and that always makes me SO nervous. It's a good thing for this quilt I'm working on -- all of my nervous energy goes into making it, rather than preparing my talk. Why am I like that?

Anyway, the quilt is coming along nicely. I'm truly amazed. I forgot to mention that I'm converting a lap size quilt pattern into a queen-ish size quilt. It's been a bit of a challenge, but I found this great website that helped me with the measurements and such:

http://www.generations-quilt-patterns.com/standard-quilt-sizes.html

Here's the quilt as of Saturday (this is without the flower appliques and trim). I'm so excited! It's very satisfying for me to see a project come together and to look at it and say, "I made that." Tawnya, I hope you LOVE it!

Okay, back to my talk. The topic I was given is "The Parables of the Sower and the Wheat and Tares". I've been a bit overwhelmed by it. I've been studying the last few days and really thinking about what these parables mean. Zeke mentioned how interesting it is that the Lord allows the "wheat" and the "tares" to grow up together. Why? He said we need each other. I think he's right. I also think at any given time we can change our hearts for good or bad. 

We decide if we will be the "wheat" or if we will be one of the "tares". I also think it is our duty to seek out the "tares", to love them and help them, regardless of their beliefs or standing in the Church. I was once a "tare" -- a full-on, nasty WEED! I'm trying to be more like a "wheat" these days, but only because dear friends of mine took me by the hand long ago and loved me and helped me want to change.

Of course we think, "Oh, I will be the wheat. I will be faithful and good. I'm on the Lord's side". But how many times do we find ourselves justifying our poor behavior? Or not standing up for something we know is right? (I'm saying this, because I'm guilty of those things sometimes).

I love this quote:

 The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.  ~Edmund Burke

I found a great talk from Elder Richard G. Scott called, "Full Conversion Brings Happiness"

I'm sharing this with you, because when I read this part, especially the personal questions he poses to us, I literally felt sick to my stomach and my mouth went dry. I'm not sure if I'm truly and fully converted... I hope so, but now I wonder.

“The sower soweth the word. [Some sown] by the way side, … but when they have heard, Satan cometh immediately, and taketh away the word that was sown in their hearts.”

Could that happen to you, in the wrong environment, with the wrong friendships?

“[Some] on stony ground; who, when they have heard the word, immediately receive it with gladness; And have no root in themselves, and so endure but for a time: afterward, when … persecution ariseth … immediately they are offended.”

Have you ever been in a circumstance when someone proposed something inappropriate and you did nothing to resist it?

“[Some] sown among thorns; such as hear the word, And the cares of this world … and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.”

Have there been times when you wanted something so badly that you justified an exception to your standards?

“[Some] sown on good ground; such as hear the word, and receive it, and bring forth fruit, some thirtyfold, some sixty, and some an hundred.” ⁸

It's always very ironic to me when I discover the topic I've been given to speak on is the exact thing I need to work on. It's even harder to realize I've been thinking I was more like a "wheat" and that I've been truly converted, but while preparing this talk, it's become painfully apparent that I have a lot of work to do. Such is the blessing of being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints -- we are constantly reminded to be better. Serving in the Church is good for me, because I'm always asked to step outside my comfort zone and to stretch and grow. 

I hope by Thursday I can post a picture of the finished quilt AND have my talk ready at least by Saturday...

Balance, Exactness, Focus

January Project: Garden Flowers Quilt

Alright. As part of my "Balance, Exactness, Focus" Mantra for 2013, I'm going to finish up some projects I started last year. I want to finish what I start and I want my mind to be less cluttered (as well as my fabric bins!)

In addition to at least half a dozen other smaller things, I have three quilts I've been working on. Yes, THREE!! A "garden flowers" quilt for my friend, Tawnya, a pinwheel quilt for "someone" (it's a surprise!), and a T-shirt quilt for Gabe.

Here's a sneak peek of the "Garden Flowers" quilt.
I LOVE the colors!!  

(By the way, my phone doesn't have a flash on it... so not the best picture.) 

This is such a fun quilt. I offered to help my friend, Tawnya, make it... oh, I think it was LAST February! Yeah, I have a problem not finishing stuff. I'm sure Tawnya is regretting the day she handed it over to me. Sorry!!! However, in my defense: we moved 6 months ago, I'm currently without a sewing table/space to sew, and I'm actually more than halfway finished.

Anyway, I've made a lot of progress in the last week! I'm kicking myself for not finishing it before we moved, but at first I was a bit intimidated by it. I'm not the most experienced quilter, really. I think I told you that, right? It's been a really good experience for me, though, and so far, I think it's looking great! There was a great little spiritual analogy that came to me while making this quilt. I need to put it down into words so I can share it with you, but today I'm trying my best to focus on the quilt.

I've made a goal to finish it by January 26th! :) 

Balance, Exactness, Focus

"I'm pretty sure this happened over night." Part One: GABE

So, we've been living in this little apartment since June. We're feeling rather cramped. Especially at night when all six of us are here. I swear my kids are ALL legs. Man, there's just no room to move! We were so naive to think our house would be done by the end of November... anyway, it's an adventure, right?

At night when everyone is restless and I don't know what ... we clear out a space in the middle of the living room and turn on some dance music. My dear friend, Sharon, made me the BEST CDs! At least I think so... my kids are asking for Oingo Boingo and Big Audio Dynamite.  I'm feeling rather proud of myself as a parent right now! It's fun to dance around with them and play; the kids need to move and wiggle. I think I do too.

We've had some impromptu dance lessons as well. Last Friday, Zeke was sick. I mean really sick. The doctor said he was getting pneumonia -- yeah, so he laid on the couch while we danced. (He's feeling much better now, by the way.) A slow song came on. I think it was "Never Tear Us Apart" from INXS (oh, the memories!)

Do you ever just REALLY want to slow dance??? Well, I do, and my sweetie was laid up on the couch. I grabbed Gabe. The girls kept giggling and staring as I tried to teach him how to slow dance. I cannot fully explain to you how totally BIZARRE it was to look UP into the eyes of my 14 year old son. (I'm nearly 5'7" already!)

Anyway, I tried to show him how I think it's cool/more romantic/proper/whatever when a guy puts one hand on your waist and "holds your other hand up like this". Are you picturing it? It reminds me of Dirty Dancing, "...spaghetti arms! would you give me some tension, please?" (No, I won't show my kids that movie, but man, I loved it when I was younger.)

So it was one of those moments I will always remember, cheesy I know, but Gabe wasn't too bugged. In fact, he seemed pretty eager to figure out this slow dance thing. Little did I know, it was perfect timing. The very next night, Gabe was at a friend's house and called me to ask if he could go to a Stake Dance with said friend's cousin's Dad. I said sure??? (Gabe has NEVER wanted to go to a Stake Dance before now.) This was around 9pm.

11pm. The door opens. In walks Gabe and his friend, Zach. They were laughing and stumbling about in the way only 14 year old boys can, simultaneously creating a wake of noise and candy wrappers as they crossed the room.

"So how was the dance?" I asked. Immediately, they launched into a VERY animated explanation of learning how to do the Electric Slide and the Macarena. Then, without any reservations whatsoever, they SHOWED us how to do the line dance to "Cotton Eye Joe". Remember, we're in a 1400 sq. ft. apartment with 3 other kids! I laughed SO hard I thought I would burst. It was priceless.

And... then (here it comes) we asked them if they got to slow dance with any girls. They both grinned and said sheepishly, "Yeah, we did." (I could swear there were little heart bubbles swirling and popping around their heads.)

Gabe got real excited and said, "MOM! Oh wow, by the way, thanks for showing me how to hold their hand up and put one hand on their waist! The girls said that was really cool! "

To all of the girls from some random Stake Dance in Sky View... "You're welcome." Oh, if ever I could be a fly on a wall...

I tried to choke down the lump in my throat. You know, maybe this Mom thing has its perks too. He was so excited! I thought, "Oh, my baby boy is slow dancing with girls!!"

Now as I type this, reality sets in and the lump I remember is replaced by a sick butterfly-type feeling in the pit of my stomach, "My baby boy is slow dancing with girls???????"

Oh dang.

Ramble On

For the record, I love Led Zeppelin. Not in the way you might think. I remember dragging main with my friend and her boyfriend (Yes, I was the lame 3rd wheel!) and we listened to "Stairway to Heaven" over and over and over and over.... no, I'm thinking about Black Dog, Kashmir, Misty Mountain Hop, Immigrant Song, and Ramble On (just popped into my head when I was trying to come up with a title for this post).

I'm kinda bummed at my lack of blogging lately. From this moment henceforth, I intend to be exceedingly serious about blogging. Well, for a moment at least. There's so much going on. TOO MUCH.  My blog has been left to fend for itself.

We've all been sick the last few days. Fever. Ache. Sore Throat. Cough. What's that commercial about NyQuil? the something something so-you-can-rest medicine. Well, anyway, I can't take NyQuil, I pretty much do the opposite of rest. I have ultra-vivid/bizarre dreams all night long, but I'm halfway between awake and asleep, so yeah. Not sure where I was going with that...

Today, I think we're somewhat on the mend thankfully. I took some of my kids to school and I was able to go visit with some friends this morning. We had a good visit about yesterday's election and some really yummy muffins. Friends and family make me so happy. :) Some of my best friends are really more like family and some of my family are my best friends. For the record, thanks for caring about me. Life is good. Crazy, but good.

Lately, I've been thinking a lot. I've been reading a lot.

Two books in particular have me thinking:

1. "Pretending to be Normal" by Liane Holliday Willey
2. "The Book of Mormon Girl" by Joanna Brooks

These books have NOTHING in common other than the fact they were both written by women.
I'm very choosy about the books I read. I don't have a lot of "free" time and I really feel like "you are what you read...." (Sorry, my head's still a bit fuzzy and I just cannot seem to stop quoting movies.... wait, I do it all the time.)

I'm glad I read both of them. For very different reasons. Both of these books are memoirs -- I could relate so well with the author in book #1, but not very much at all with the author in book #2. However, we are all women. I respect them and their courage to tell their story; to share their honest opinions and most personal experiences. Somehow, it makes me want to be a better person and reach out to others more; to love everyone regardless of our differences.

It's funny how books come into my life at the right time.

There's a lot more I want to say, but alas, I randomly started writing this post at a most dangerous time: 4pm on a Wednesday. I should be making dinner and helping with homework.

Okay.... you've been spared for now.

Barrett's Unusual Ice Cream Party

Hey everyone, I just wanted to share a link to my friend's book she recently published. Her name is Michelle King and well, I think she is just FABULOUS in so many ways! :) Way to go, Michelle! I hope to follow in her footsteps, she has really helped me take that first leap trying to get my book published as well.

Here's the link to her first book:

Barrett's Unusual Ice Cream Party

And here's the link to her blog:

Michelle L. King, Children's Book Author

Happy Windsday!

Buttermilk Syrup and Belgian Waffles

Yesterday went well. I'm glad my checkup is over. Today is payday and I need to go grocery shopping so this will be quick.

My friend, Colleen, gave me a great recipe for Buttermilk Syrup. We especially LOVE it on waffles.

BUTTERMILK SYRUP

1/2 cup sugar

3/4 cup buttermilk

1/2 cup butter

2 tsp. corn syrup

1/2 tsp. baking soda

Boil for 7 minutes, stirring constantly and then add two teaspoons vanilla. Serve warm. Hint: you will need to make this in a large pan because it foams up when it starts to boil.

Last week, I saw a great recipe for Belgian Waffles over at "Twelve Makes a Dozen". Her blog is really fun! Twelve Kids! Wow. Thanks, Sandy, for letting me link to your blog and your great recipe. :) Happy FRIDAY, everyone!

"Word of the Year" Pillows...

Yesterday's bang-cutting fiasco turned out alright... I'll post pictures later. Maybe. :) This morning I have to go in for my annual OBGYN checkup, YUCKY times 1,000!!!!! I haven't been too worried about it and although this makes no sense, that MAKES me worry about it. I'm trying to convince myself otherwise, but I just feel good this year. It's been more than a whole year and I've been FINE. (Freaked-out, insecure, neurotic, and emotional -- no really, I'm fine!)

Anyhoo.... Thursday: Threads and Things...

I made a pillow for my friend's birthday last week. She has chosen "LOVE" for her word of the year. I forgot to get a picture of her at Book Club... Camille's blog is "Behind the Quiet". She is a lot of fun and I think she chose a really great word to focus on. Happy Birthday, Camille, I hope you like the pillow!

Sewing on the beads:

 

All finished (it's about a 9x9 inch square):

  Close-up of the beads:

 I had fun making this pillow. I got some red beads (LOVE just looks RED to me) and I used an extra silver napkin for the pillow. :)

I'm hoping to make other pillows for my friends (and maybe myself) to help remind them of their word they are focusing on this year.
 Kaia made her own pillow, It says: "Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, just like you!"
I love this girl. She LOVES to make stuff.

 She also made a pillow for Beck. It says: "I love GREEN!" That was his request.

"Crafting" and Paisley Cinnamon

According to my new BLOG SCHEDULE, today is:

"Thursday Threads and Things".  

I really love sewing and crafts and making all sorts of stuff...

but I wasn't really sure what I would post for you today.
I'm actually working on two projects right now (yeah, I'm like that),
but they are going to be gifts and I don't want to ruin the surprise!

As far as "crafting" goes, this is what I came up with:

I've been meticulously and mercifully molding measured smiles from this:

 Carefully coercing and creating compromises with this one who thinks she should start wearing make-up:

 Artfully administering admonition, advice, and affection when this one always seems to have a "misunderstanding" with one of her siblings and her "feelers" are hurt: 

Deviously designing devices and other delightful doings to hold this one's attention in order to keep him from destroying my entire house: 

(Thanks for the giant puppy, Grandma Patty!)

So I HAVE been busy "crafting": 

molding, creating, artfully administering, and designing CHILDREN.

It's a BIG project, but I know it will be worth it. 

Although I'm not very good at it most days...I'm learning a lot as I go.

And some days I would MUCH rather be sewing, crocheting, painting a wall, making a wreath or ANYTHING other than trying to be a good parent. 

It's hard work!

Okay, I'll stop holding out on you. Really. 

Here is a good friend of mine, Sharon, who KNOWS HOW TO CRAFT -- when it comes to raising children AND the real kind of crafting that I merely attempt to... well, attempt.

Her blog is called:

Paisley Cinnamon

I am absolutely amazed at the stuff she comes up with.  She is SO creative. 

You should see her house!

She's one of those people that really has an eye for color and design and 

she's not afraid to try things. 

She gets an idea and then makes it happen.

Go explore her blogs and get inspired!

She's also starting an Etsy shop -- there's a link on her blog.

I definitely have LOTS of ideas from her blogs and I hope to come up with a creation of my own for next Thursday. Happy Crafting!

New Family Photos!

Well, to follow my BLOG SCHEDULE, it's "Wordless Wednesday" and for those of you that know me personally... I can NEVER be without words. So maybe I should call it "Worded-down Wednesday" -- what it means is that I will be posting a picture or two and I want you to come up with some fun captions and then I'll pick one I like and add it to the post...

Today's pictures are some family pictures we had taken in November 2011 by one of my very good friends, Lora. We had a lot of fun and I really like how the pictures turned out. Enjoy!

Here's the hoop -- should I jump?

Look at this cute guy... he LOVES climbing in our tree.
Christmas isn't really Christmas without a kitten... life is good.

How's life? How's your Christmas preparations coming? You may think I am just one of those annoyingly perky people during Christmas... I love it! All of it. My friend, Stephanie, did a great blog post about that today and well, I'll just say DITTO to what she said. (and Steph, for the record, I might send out New Year's Cards again, the budget is *tight*)

Our family is also doing something really special this year... more on that later.

Okay, so in my last post, I told you that I sent my children's story to two publishers... (now three) well, I got a positive response from one of them just five days later.... WHAT?!?!?!?!

Yeah, I was pretty excited and I know they are a reputable company because a friend of mine has recently published with them; however, they require a $2,000 retainer FEE. :( Yes, I just heard screeching brakes, did you? Anyway, the retainer fee is fully refundable upon the sale of 1000 copies of my book. Blargh! I knew it wouldn't be that easy the first time out of the gates, but man, that email got me excited! From what I've heard, that is fairly common for unknown authors wanting to publish their first book.

I firmly believe that if I'm supposed to publish this book something better will come along. I wish I was Anne Shirley and there was a local "Rollings Reliable Baking Powder" Company that needed a boost. I bet I could win that!

Anyway, I love Christmas and for the moment, we are all basically healthy... which is kinda freaking me out.

I love my kids. We made some cardboard box cars this week just for fun.
And it was.
Beck slept in his last night.

Zoe and I went to a USU women's basketball game with her class. SO fun!

Here she is with "Big Blue", the USU mascot!
Zoe said he stunk like cologne... just keep thinking that way, sweetie.

Kaia's still awake (it's 10:15) and she's crying. Zeke is up there with her and I should go help. He is such a great guy... which kinda freaks me out too.

This should probably be another post, but I want to do a "Word of the Year" thing like my good friend, Tawnya. She is most groovy, by the way. I think it's a great idea and a way for me to really make some changes in my life all through the year. Not a big list of "resolutions", I've never been one for that really, but something simple. Something I can think about and implement everyday.

Once I decided to do this, the word I wanted came to mind almost instantly:

DISCIPLINE
dis.ci.pline (noun)

1. training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline.

2. activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training: A daily stint at the typewriter is excellent discipline for a writer.

3. punishment inflicted by way of correction and training.

4. the rigor or training effect of experience, adversity, etc.: the harsh discipline of poverty.

5. behavior in accord with rules of conduct; behavior and order maintained by training and control: good discipline in an army.

This is what I jotted down on my phone:
TIME
MONEY
STUDY
GIVE
PROGRESS
SELF

I'll expand more on that list as I figure out exactly what I was thinking when I wrote it.
For the most part, I want to focus on our money and get out of debt. This year is the year!
I feel like the planets are aligning...

Blogging is Good, MY MUSIC is Better, Best Picture

Well, you may have noticed I haven't been blogging much...

You know when you look at your schedule and your life and all you want to accomplish and be...
What can I cut out? It hasn't really been a conscious thought, but I haven't been blogging and I don't really have the urge at the moment.

I have been listening to a great radio station, 101.9 "The End", thanks to my friend, Sharon! I don't buy very much music anymore so this has been a true gem to find this station. X96 just isn't the same. SHARON, I OWE YOU! I can't believe how much I LOVE this music SO much better than anything else. I feel differently when I listen to it. GOOD different. I feel like I've found an old friend. I feel alive. Listening to this music back in the day was the reason I survived growing up in Salina, Utah. YES, it is TRUE! Mistie... you can attest to this!

It makes me SO happy: Oasis, The Cure, Bush, The Pixies, Death Cab for Cutie, Modern English, Beck, OMD, Camouflage, Depeche Mode, Coldplay, Broken Bells, Yaz, ABC, They Might Be Giants, Toad the Wet Sprocket, 311, Foster the People, The Waterboys, Duran Duran, Midnight Oil, Modest Mouse, Men Without Hats, Dave Matthew's Band, Incubus, Jet, The Cranberries, Love and Rockets, The Verve, Blink-182, The Smithereens, Violent Femmes, The Fixx, David Bowie, Weezer, Cage the Elephant, Oingo Boingo, Crowded House, Talking Heads, Middle Class Rut, Cake, The Cult, Echo and the Bunnymen, Green Day, Keane, INXS, Fall Out Boy, Stone Temple Pilots, Eurythmics, U2, Evanescence. The Fray, The Clash, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Xymox, Peter Gabriel, 30 Seconds to Mars, R.E.M., Big Audio Dynamite, AFI, The Killers, Muse, Radiohead, The Proclaimers, Anything Box, A-ha, B-52's, The Cult, Snow Patrol, Bare Naked Ladies, The Black Keys, Tears for Fears, Erasure, Jimmy Eat World, Neon Trees, Dashboard Confessional, Wall of Voodoo, Smashing Pumpkins, Collective Soul, Switchfoot, Jane's Addiction, Linkin Park, Incubus, Bronsky Beat, Jesus Jones, Mighty Lemon Drops, Information Society, The Smith's, Franz Ferdinand, King, Sould Asylum, Thompson Twins, Anything Box, Howard Jones, Pet Shop Boys, Underworld, Figures On a Beach, New Order, etc, etc, etc. :) I'm sure I've missed some...

We went to Colorado to visit Zeke's parents last week and it was a great trip. Really great. As usual, I was too busy doing stuff to take pictures, but here's one of a few and definitely my favorite:

Grandma and Beck

See you in awhile...... enjoy life, find the good in people, take time to relax, play and laugh with your kids, read a good book, hug your sweetie, pet your cat (if you don't have one, come pet mine, it makes me happy).

I love all of my family and I hope everyone is doing well and feeling good. I miss you ALL. Here's a great big cyber (((HUG))) from me! :)

Pray for Jacob

This is what has been on my mind.
This is their story: Living StrongeR

Jacob is the son of Zeke's good childhood friend, Josh.

Liz, Josh's wife, is an amazing writer and mother. Their family is so strong and brave. Jacob was diagnosed with leukemia in April 2011. My heart hurts when I think of what they are going through right now, not only because we know them, but because Jacob and Jericho are so close to Gabe and Beck's ages.
I cannot imagine.

Liz and Josh: We love you and we're praying for you and your sweet family every day! I hope Jacob can get stronger and feel better everyday and make a full recovery.

This is a picture of Zeke and Josh wrestling way back when,
I'm guessing they were about 13 or 14 here: (look at all of Zeke's hair!)

Here's a picture of Gabe (left) and Jacob (right) in 1998:

How many Chips Ahoy cookies can you eat in one sitting?

Tonight I am tired, but Zeke is working late and the kids are in bed. Lots of rambling will inevitably follow... you have been warned!

Well, I'm feeling very random this week. I'm looking at the calendar and summer is almost over. Part of me is happy -- I'm ready for more structure and routine and not so much craziness 24/7 with the kids. (Yes, I'm one of THOSE Moms, start your eye-rolling and tsk-tsk-ing now if you must... whatever!) Part of me is sad too, because I don't feel like we've had enough time (or money) to do all of the things I wanted to.

Summer has been a whirlwind of running from here to there and staying home just long enough to play catch-up on the housekeeping (and just barely at that).

I haven't felt very good this week. Mostly today. My loveliest of lovely friends, Tawnya, brought me some back up: Chips Ahoy cookies and Tim's Sour Cream and Onion Potato chips. Yes, for the record they were absolutely divine! Crunchy, chocolatey, salty, sugary goodness. How did you know I love each of these? Thank you! I think I ate 7 or 8 cookies for lunch (yes, for lunch). Then, I had a couple more when I was fixing dinner. Today was a day I needed some comfort food. Tawnya is SO wonderful. I hugged her even though she's not a hugger. Sorry, Tawnya, I just had to! I tried not to break down crying when I opened the door to see my dear friend. I feel like such a baby lately.

Beautiful, aren't they?

Yesterday wasn't exactly my favorite day. Not the worst by any means, but not my favorite. I almost hit a car as I was merging over into the right lane. Zeke says they were in my "blind spot" and they were too close, but it was SO close. It really threw me off. It scared the ba-jeebers out of me and as we pulled into the gas station, I just started crying. Crying because I'm tired, crying because I was scared, crying because I'm frustrated, crying because I'm sick of paying doctor bills (nearly $500 a month!), crying because I don't know why (I realized today that my hormones are out of whack like they always seem to be every couple weeks).

I'm feeling so down on our financial situation. I'm not feeling as optimistic as I was last year at all. I was reading through last summer's posts and I was a nut! I didn't care if we had $5 to our name and last year, we didn't! I was living on faith and just going with the flow and things were taken care of. This year, Zeke has a new job (a better paying job I might add), but the expenses just keep rolling in. I guess I need to recognize that at least we have enough to pay our bills. I am proud to say we are still not incurring any more debt (other than doctor bills, but who has a few thousand dollars just sitting around not earmarked for something else?) Someday we will, but today is not that day. It's like one step forward and ten steps back.

I've also felt a bit somber this last week. My great uncle Nyals passed away. Then, Norma, one of the sweetest older ladies in my parents ward passed away. These deaths came as "blessings" so to speak. Both of them were very old and their poor bodies were just worn out. To top it off, an older sister of one of my neighborhood friends was brutally shot to death right in front of her own son. She was only 39 years old. Life is short. I am so grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I hope I can become better and better each day so I am ready to meet God when it's my turn to go. Not that I want to go anytime soon. I'm just feeling rather reflective and thankful for Nyals and Norma, but really sad for Tina and her family. I wonder what my kids would say at my funeral? She was tired all the time and cried a lot. Gosh, I hope not! I feel like I'm not living up to my potential each day.

I find myself not accomplishing much these past few weeks. That really bums me out. I look at my house and I just feel more tired. I don't know where to start. When I do, a fight ensues somewhere on another floor of the house. It usually involves Beck and whoever. He is at that age where he's trying to figure out his place in the pecking order so to speak. He wants to be big and do everything the big kids do, but he can't and he knows it, but does it anyway. He spills food every meal, everyday. It's not my favorite thing. He will NOT allow us to sit and watch (and actually hear) a movie. He just can't sit still for that long, even if it's one of HIS movies. Oh, and after a bout of stomach flu, Beck has fallen off the potty-training wagon. Or is he back on? I'm just worn out.

Yesterday, he was sitting at the table coloring and swinging his legs and singing to a made-up tune, "I love my Mommy, she's so cute!" And I proceeded to completely melt right there on the kitchen floor. I wrapped him up in my arms and started crying. (I'm always crying lately)

Why are the hardest things in our lives some of the best things?

Zeke and Gabe made it home safely from Scout Camp on Saturday and I am so grateful. I was missing Gabe SO bad last week. The day before he left I absolutely could not wait for him to go. (Sorry, Gabe!) The incessant teasing, fighting over computer turns, arguments over curfew and chores, and the extremely loveable, somewhat annoying, but ever constant: "Mom, guess what? I'm taller than you!" By Tuesday, I was being a baby, crying some more and wishing I could hear him tell me again that he's taller than me.

Then, last night I watched "Soul Surfer" with Zoe, Kaia, and Zeke. Now, it's not one of the best movies ever made, but the story is really good. The girls loved it, especially Zoe. Even though it's rated PG, Kaia was more than a little freaked out by the shark attack scene. She was up well past midnight crying that she wants to keep all of her arms and legs and NEVER go in the ocean. Oh dear. I must admit I found myself thinking the same thing and even woke up last night from a nightmare about it. (I'm almost 37, by the way. Yeah.)

This girl is AMAZING. Her name is Bethany Hamilton. I love movies and books based on true stories. It had a great message, but I found myself being a little negative about it and then mad at myself because I was. Her family lives in Hawaii and they surf. A LOT. In fact, that's ALL they did. Oh, and they went to church a few times. And surfed and surfed and surfed some more.

My dear husband of 15 years leans over (just as my mind was forming the exact same thought) and says, "What does her parents DO for a living?" "How can they have that much money to live in Hawaii and basically play all day?" I know movies don't show everything, but it seemed to be more than a little vague in that part of the story, if not completely absent. Just wondering.

Okay, so today my kids had to watch the movie 4 MORE TIMES! We got our dollars worth at the Redbox this time! Kaia says, "You know Mom, this movie has really taught me that I should believe in myself and I can do anything I want if I try hard enough!" (She's seven, by the way) Then, she says, "I've decided I want to be a surfer more than anything, but well, since I'm afraid of sharks (no, really?) and since we don't live near an ocean (good point), I'm going to go outside and climb a tree. A really big one." I love what she comes up with. Her take on this movie just made me smile.

Zoe and Kaia have talked about Bethany Hamilton ALL day! I think they'll talk about her for some time to come. Today, they tucked one of their arms in their shirts and were even pretending they only had one arm, just like Bethany. I hope they always remember her story and really believe they can do anything they want to. Well, as long as it doesn't involve oceans. Just kidding. Not really.

I went to the Relief Society Activity for our ward tonight. It was about Education. I was thinking, "Okay, whatever, it's not my time yet." But it was REALLY good. I'll have about 5 hours of "free time" each week during the school year when Beck is in preschool and the older kids are at school. I've been planning to go to the temple one of the days and the other is a free day to do errands, house projects, etc. Just for me. I've waited over 13 years for this. I hope I didn't jinx it. Anyway, one of the speakers talked about the Cache Valley Volunteer Center and I got so excited about it! I'm going to check into it and volunteer a couple days a month. I would like to volunteer at the Literacy Center or the Humane Society.

Anyway, there is no point to this post. I just have so much in my head and it feels good to get some of it out. So I ate about 10 cookies today -- and I didn't get sick at all. Yay, KEFIR! I would be eating more right now, but when I got home from the Relief Society Activity they were ALL GONE. Gabe found them. End of story.