Please: open mouth, remove foot, insert spoon.

Yes, it's Thursday and I should be posting about "Threads and Things"... Here's an old chair of mine that I recovered and painted last week. I think it turned out great. Thanks for the inspiration, Sharon. :) I fudged and bought a $3.00 can of spray paint... oops! It had to be done!! I'll add it to my list.

BEFORE

AFTER

This post is for all of those people who don't really know me. Or people who do and they don't listen or get it. I don't want your sympathy, but I do want people to stop saying things like:

• "I wish I had your problem!"
• "What's your secret? It's not fair!"
• "You're so LUCKY; you're just 'naturally' skinny"
• "But you don't LOOK sick!!"

STOP. Please. It bothers me MORE than I can say. I've heard more, but these are the ones I hear the most. You'd be surprised how many people say these types of things to me. Friends. Family Members. Strangers. Do you want to know my "secret" for being so thin? I don't feel lucky at all and I would never wish my "problem" on anyone. Assume nothing. You never know why people are the way they are.

I remember back when I was 18 and I used to ride my bike to work 12 miles round trip, 5 days a week. I remember going for bike rides or walks when I was at Snow College for hours and hours and not feeling tired at all. I remember going to Slick Rock in Moab with my brother, Brady.  I was very active.

Then, right before I turned 19, I got really sick and to make a long story short, (Too late!) I had some serious kidney problems that changed my life forever. Now, I'm not on dialysis or on a waiting list for a transplant or anything. The major problems cleared up in about six months. But I have never been the same since. I have been SO blessed to be able to have four children (something I was told by my doctor might not happen).

Most days I'm fine, but I get worn out quite easily and can't do all the things I used to do. It's hard for me to see other people doing things. I feel left behind. I feel lazy. I feel guilty. I feel old. 

I have a lot of health problems. Some of them, I'm not even sure what they are yet, but this week I've been blindsided by another kidney infection. It's been a year since my last one and it's so hard not to get discouraged. But I feel so blessed to be alive and to have such a wonderful family. I seriously do NOT deserve my husband. He has been so kind and patient with me this week. Too kind.

My friend, Shauntae, had a link on her blog called: The Spoon Theory. It's about living with chronic illness. I read this about a year ago and it made me cry. PLEASE don't jump to conclusions: I DO NOT HAVE LUPUS like this woman, but her analogy is so true to my life. It's a bit long, but it's worth reading to help you understand what it's like for people with chronic illness.

It's so hard for me to slow down and realize I simply cannot do everything I want to. But I know God has a plan for each of us and we need the FAITH to hold on.

2 Nephi 31: 20 "Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life."

This is my thinking face

I feel so behind on blogs and blogging. We had a good trip. It's always nice to see my parents. I didn't feel too well most of the time and well, that's just not any fun is it? Can I just tell you how much my parents LOVE the soundtrack to Mamma Mia? ha ha ha... good times. We went for a ride with them and they were SO into the music. It was a treat to see them out of the house and enjoying each other and the music. :)

I'm trying to get my children into some kind of summer routine. Yesterday was great, but I'm not sure yet how blogging will fit into it. Yesterday was also full of unpacking and extra laundry.

I'm trying to finish reading a book because Book Club is TONIGHT! I'm excited, but I've gotta get reading! So far, I really like the book. It's called, "The Forgotten Garden" by Kate Morton. We'll see how it ends. I also need to find a babysitter because Zeke and Gabe are going hiking with the deacons... I will TRIUMPH!

I always feel kinda weird visiting the cemetary... kind of sad and just really introspective. So many memories, so many regrets, so many worries, so many questions, so many hopes and wishes. I enjoyed going to visit the graves of both sets of grandparents, as well as my sister, Brenda, and my cousin, Rory. Life is SO precious. It can be over in an instant. This weekend was FULL of emotions and I find myself overly cautious and smiling on the outside, but worrying like a paranoid crazy person on the inside.

Here's my Mom, Zoe, and Kaia at the Centerfield, Utah Cemetary... it was very cold and windy. This is the headstone of my paternal grandparents, Leo and Eliza Andersen. Don't you just love Zoe and Kaia's headbands/bows? My Mom always has some special little thing for them. She is THE best grandma.
I am so thankful that she can be part of their lives.

Here's the boys: my Dad, Gabe, and Beck
(sorry the picture is so fuzzy, I took it from my phone)

The highlight of the weekend was my Dad singing "one of his songs"... you just have to know my Dad. I'll have to share a few with you later. But this was a song I've never heard before and well, before he got to the second verse, my Mom came running in and shut him up. My kids were laughing so hard and just DYING to know what he was going to sing. Dad, I'm still curious. You said you'd sing it to Zeke later and he could sing it to me. Oh, I can only imagine. :)

As soon as I finish that book, I will catch up on my blog reading!
Oh, and go hug your little ones at least two or three times, ok? :)

Professor Babe and Procrastination Queen

Did I tell you that Zeke is teaching a class at the University this semester? I am SO proud of him and excited for him. The class is called: "Real Time Systems" and it has something to do with robotics and computers and that's about all I know about that... something something UML... sorry, honey, my mind just can't quite grasp it.

He's really great in front of people. (I'm not) He's one of those people that actually feels comfortable and even enjoys speaking in public. He's very articulate and funny and interesting to listen to. But I am his wife...

Anyway, he's always wanted to do this and a great friend of his asked him to teach the class with him. Good Luck, Babe! Can I call you Professor Babe? And Professor Babe gets paid too :)

I love this picture of him with Caspian and Pippin. He tries to pretend he doesn't like the cats, but he DOES. And the shirt. He loves this shirt! Oh boy, last weekend my Mom and I made the mistake of asking him what it means... yeah, our eyes glazed over in no time. Sorry, babe.

Here's Zeke playing Guitar Hero during Christmas:

And then there's me: I've had a sinus/ear infection thingy all week and I haven't felt very good. When I have been feeling good, I haven't been cleaning... check out my kitchen :( Blah...
Some days, I feel like a little kid playing house... all I want to do is play with the cats and my kids and bake cookies and make stuff. When I have been feeling good, I've been working on my Primary lesson. I love my little CTR 5 class! And I've been playing "Just Dance" on the Wii. It is so much fun! Good times :)

My brother, Jody, gave me a can of Green Curry sauce when we visited him on Monday. How cute is that? We both LOVE Thai food and he made sure I took it home with me. I can't wait to use it. Thanks, Jode, I love ya! Growing up, I remember watching Jody cook and tasting many of his creations. We always had a lot of fun together.

One of my most favorite quotes of all time is: "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result." ~ Albert Einstein

Really if you think about it... this quote is very profound. It applies to almost anything and has seriously changed my life. I've been feeling kinda bummed out this week and I know being sick doesn't help, but I thought about this quote and thought about something I should change.

Since school started in August, I've been getting up at 6:30 to get the kids ready and Beck wakes up too and I pretty much hit the ground running. I say a quick prayer while I'm in the shower trying to keep Beck from poking me with his toys and I try my best to get through the day. At night after the kids are in bed, I curl up in my bed with Zeke and attempt to read my scriptures for at least 10 minutes. Well, once my body is holding still and the house is quiet... I fall asleep in 2.7 minutes... so yeah, I'm not really getting enough personal scripture study.

By some miracle, Beck slept until 8:15 this morning. Today as soon as I got the kids off to school, I went upstairs in my room, knelt down and said my prayers and read my scriptures until Beck woke up. It was wonderful. I needed it.

I changed how I was doing things and I know I'll get a different result. I'm going to try my best to start the day off with my scriptures.

2 Nephi 32: 3-4 "Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ. Wherefore, I said unto you, feast upon the words of Christ; for behold, the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do. Wherefore, now after I have spoken these words, if ye cannot understand them it will be because ye ask not, neither do ye knock; wherefore, ye are not brought into the light, but must perish in the dark."

I can take a hint!

Here I am. Monday, January 3rd, 2011. The 3 older kids are back at school again. Zeke is at work. Beck is watching "Kipper" (Thank you, Netflix!) And I'm thinking I need to post on my blog... it's been a week and that's a long time for me!

This last week has been a blur. The entire holiday break is a blur. But we did have fun in spite of all the sickness. And more importantly, we are feeling better for the most part. I'm doing as well as I can right now.

Way back in January 2007, my Dad had a heart attack and I wanted to go see him. Zeke was so wonderful. He took off work and stayed home with the kids so I could drive to Orem where my Dad was in the hospital. Only one problem: my retarded bladder was acting up again. (FYI, stress is one of the triggers for my IC) I remember Zeke gave me a blessing before I left and it was one of those blessings that you didn't really feel better, but you felt peace at the same time. Does that make any sense at all? Probably not. But he said something like, "You will have health problems your entire life, but you will be able to enjoy your life in spite of them." It took my breath away, but at the same time I already knew that would be my fate. I am just so thankful to be here.

I don't suffer from any serious/major health problems really, but I always have something. Anyway, my IC has been terrible this Christmas. Dr. Pitcher gave me a HUGE list of foods that can be triggers for a flare up. Chocolate is one of them. I'm almost positive it affects me. NOT CHOCOLATE! I love chocolate so much! Really. But as horrible as I have felt, it's an easy trade. 2011 will be very different in that respect. But I might fudge a little on that one now and then, no pun intended!

We watched two great movies over the holiday:

"Avalon High" -- A Disney movie made from a book by Meg Cabot (author of the Princess Diaries). Now, this movie won't win any major awards, but I LOVED it! We all did! The twist at the end was AWESOME! I love when I'm surprised by a movie. Very cute. It's all about King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table, Sir Lancelot, and Queen Guinevere. My kind of movie.

"Stone of Destiny" -- true story about Ian Hamilton, a guy from Scotland who tried to raid Westminster Abbey in 1951 to bring back the "Stone on Scone" a symbol of Scottish pride back to Scotland where it should be. LOVED THIS!! Charlie Cox from "Stardust" starred in this movie. He's great.

Gabe made shoes out of duct tape! He is so creative.
He actually wore them to school today. :)

On New Year's Eve, we took the kids bowling. It was great!
This was Beck's first time :)

Zeke cooked steak and homemade fries for us and we also had Fortune Cookies (one of our New Year's traditions). I guess I'm the kind of person that believes in fate and destiny and all that, but I try to take my fortunes pretty seriously. The rest of the family got happy, predictable, positive fortunes like: "You will be very prosperous and successful in your business ventures." or "Your travel plans will take an exciting turn this year." or "Your wit and ingenuity will bring great success to your life."

Well, this was my fortune for 2011:

"There is a time to be practical -- NOW."

Coincidence, no! Remember the quote from Elder Holland, "A coincidence is just a small miracle in which God chooses to remain anonymous." This fortune was PERFECT for me. Not exactly what I wanted to hear (not at all really), but I can take a hint.

I have too many plans, I'm trying to run faster than I am able and I know I just need to slow down. For now, my New Year's plans are to:

1. Join the Ward Choir (I've been waiting for the "perfect" timing and I think this is as good as it's going to get)

2. Finish writing my book... more details later. I actually have 3 book ideas, but I've decided to focus on one this year and see if I can actually get it published.

3. Take better care of myself.

4. AND take Ballroom Dance lessons with Zeke! (Did I tell you that was his Christmas present to me?) I was so excited, I started crying when I opened the envelope.

Happy New Year!!

I forgot to add a scripture to go with this post (this is one of my goals for the year as well):

Jacob 6:12 says, "O be wise; what can I say more?"

"All these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good..."

Doctrine and Covenants 122:7-9 "And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?...therefore, fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever."

Well, I'm still here, barely. Now, I'm not saying my life is that hard... times have been much harder for sure... but what a weekend!

So Zeke got home Wednesday afternoon...

Gabe watched the kids for us while we went to Zeke's work party... first party with the new company... it will take some time to adjust. I didn't know anyone and all the employees talked about work the whole time. They served us a yummy dinner, but it tasted way too salty to me. I didn't even like the chocolate raspberry cheesecake! Yeah, I think I was starting to get sick that night... I just felt off.

Here's a rundown of our Christmas via Facebook (bear with me... my head feels like it weighs 30 pounds at least):

Dec. 23rd: well, thanks "SC", for a Merry Christmas :) and here we are... Kaia AND Zoe are both sick now... C'est la vie...

Dec. 24th: Dear friends and neighbors... please know that we love you and thank you for all the goodies and gifts... this year we will give you a gift of NOT giving you our germs... this morning we are ALL sick (except for Zeke). You don't want this bug, I promise.

Dec. 24th: looks like the Tooth Fairy will have to hitch a ride with Santa tonight...

Dec. 25th: Merry Christmas everyone! I am so thankful for my family and for our Savior Jesus Christ and for Ibuprofen.:)

Dec. 25th: okay, so we all have colds... but Zoe is coughing up blood... any ideas what could be going on? I'm thinking bronchitis? do I need to take her right in? or can it wait until Monday?

Dec. 25th: thanks everyone, Zeke and Zoe are home. Dr. said her lungs are clear for now. He said her throat is very raw and inflamed; could be causing the bleeding. He gave her a steroid to help with the inflammation. We have to take her back to the Dr. on Monday to make sure there's no infection/pneumonia. Dr. said Zoe probably just has a nasty virus. Well, it could be worse, right? :)

Dec. 26th: I think I'm done... last night, Beck got THE worst nose bleed I've ever seen... he was even bleeding out of his tear ducts... that was before he threw up all the blood the ran down his throat...okay, so if you want to start the bidding for the movie rights.... we just need a title... I'm sure it will be a big money maker....

Yesterday, Zeke's Mom stopped by to say HI.
Oh, Patty, thank you for coming!! and thank you for the great presents!

It finally felt like Christmas! I sure hope she doesn't get sick. Gabe is the only one with a fever still. We're getting better, but it's going to take awhile. And by some amazing miracle, Zeke hasn't got sick...yet. I think Zoe was the sickest so far. Poor girl. I'll put up more pictures later...

Beck and Kaia are lovin' the Zhu Zhu pets...

Beck got a Hot Wheels garage...

I am so thankful for prayer. I know I've prayed a lot before, but this weekend is definitely in the top 10. Beck's nosebleed just about did me in. It was one of THE scariest things I've ever been through. Poor Beck! I'm thankful for Priesthood blessings and just for time. It's nice to see Kaia getting better; it gives me hope for the rest of us. I'm thankful that Zeke was here to help me, sorry honey! One of these days we won't be sick during the holidays...

Zeke and I really enjoyed watching Pippin watch TV with us last night... yeah, it doesn't take much to entertain us.

The Greatest "Hallowasn't"

Thanks to my dear friend Winnie the Pooh,
"We'll celebrate a Hallowasn't instead!"

Friday was the costume parade at the girl's elementary school. Zoe went by so fast (on purpose) I made her pose for a picture after school. She looked so beautiful as "The Blue Fairy". I often look at her and wonder if she wouldn't mind dating until she's like 20 or so? yeah, I'm okay with that.

Kaia came waltzing in with a giant migration map of the world she found in the "National Geographic" the night before. I had so many people come up to me, "So what's the map for? What is she supposed to be?" I said, "I have no idea, she's Kaia, I didn't even know she brought the map to school!" It actually looked quite cute.

Beck absolutely REFUSED to wear a costume. So he was "Beck" at the Halloween Party. I did get him to wear his race car driver costume for about 5 minutes after the elementary costume parade.

Friday night was our church "Fall Festival" (code name for Halloween Party). It's always so much fun! Fishing Pond, Bean Bag Toss, Face Painting, Cupcake Walk, Chili cook-off, etc. My kids always love the donuts on a string game.

Gabe helped Zeke with the Duck Pond Game. I had fun coloring his hair and wrapping him up too:) I love that my children want to do their own thing. Gabe had to have bright orange mummy wrappings. White? nah, everyone dresses up like a white mummy.

They always give out crazy awards for the best costumes and the best chili. Zeke got the "Real Man" award for his engineering attempt at Princess Leia. Yes, those are real cinnamon rolls! He is a bit whacked and that is precisely why I love him!

I spent the entire night chasing Beck around... but I still had fun. I really enjoyed my "Luna Lovegood" costume. Only a few people knew who I was and even then, they were like "Okay, so you're like some Harry Potter person or something?" It's okay, not everyone is obsessed like me! I tried to explain the radish earrings, the butter beer cork necklace, the Quibbler advertisement, the wand behind my ear... their eyes would glaze over. True to Luna, I knew who I was and I was darn proud of myself! And for me, that's what makes it fun. By about 7:30 though, I was done. I was TIRED. I couldn't wait to get home. I think I overdid it. My friend, Peggy, said she was surprised to see me since I've been so sick (and I'm thinking, yeah, I know I'm crazy.) I'm just like a kid, I don't want to miss Halloween! We all came home feeling blah.

Gabe got up early Saturday morning and went to the best of EFY. (yay, Gabe!) Zoe went with a friend to decorate sugar cookies at their church. Kaia and Beck woke up with fevers. Yep, leave it to us to be sick on a holiday. It's TRADITION! Just ask our family. After the ibuprofen kicked in, Kaia had fun playing with the Halloween makeup. Zeke had to work for awhile that morning. I didn't feel good and wanted to get some laundry done. Later that morning, it started raining a LOT and even a skiff or two of snow. The girls said this must be the worst Halloween ever.

Anyway, later that day, we carved pumpkins. Beck grabbed a knife faster than you can say "RATS!" and cut his finger pretty bad. Zeke put pressure on it for awhile and Beck fell asleep while he was holding him (coincidence?, I think not!) While he was sleeping, we were able to put some "New Skin" (liquid bandage) on it. (It stings like no other and yet he slept right through it) I think we were spared from a trip to the ER. I started thinking the girls might be right.

Around 4pm, we thought we'd better load up the kids and take them trick or treating for a bit. Kaia and Zoe didn't even want to go. WHAT?! yeah, they must not feel good. Gabe went trick-or-treating with some friends, but came home early and said our neighborhood gives out better candy than "Cliffside"(the fancy schmancy rich people area). Some of our friends stopped by and I really enjoyed seeing them. Thanks, Amelia, Curtis, Jen, and family! Things were looking up.

We decided to go trick-or-treating in our house. The kids went from room to room while Zeke and I hid behind the doors. Zeke had on a different costume (and personality) every time: Rastafarian, Mullet-topped Nascar fan, Cowboy, and Cheerleader. I wish I was cool like that. I kissed him at every door, except the cheerleader... a little too weird. I think I like the Rasta guy. Yeah, mon! That was my Halloween treat! By then, the girls decided this was the best Halloween ever and I really had to agree.